


Without Hesitation

by PlagueChan



Category: The Ren & Stimpy Show
Genre: M/M, NSFW, OC X CANON, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-10
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-10-25 12:17:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 23,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17725037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlagueChan/pseuds/PlagueChan
Summary: After reading a letter from an old friend, Ren, Stimpy, and many others finds themselves in a place of where hard roads have to be crossed and hard decisions have to be made. Hearts will be broken, and things will never be the same.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Please know that I do not own Ren and Stimpy for they belong to Nickelodeon while Johnathan is my character. I also do not own any music lyrics that will/are mentioned in some chapters. I do this for purely entertainment, no fund gains whatsoever~ This is a slash fanfiction of Ren and Stimpy and does have my R/S OC Johnathan on which will be more fleshed out than he was in my old fanfiction. This will have OCxCanon Character moments but I reassure you that this is an Ren/Stimpy fanfic. Also please be warned that this fanfiction does contain material that might make some readers uncomfortable as it discusses violence, sex, abuse, and drugs and alcohol so viewer discretion is advised.

3 o'clock in the morning. That’s what the alarm clock on Ren’s nightstand showed. Has it really been that long? Has it been so many years ago when he remembered a long-time friend for the first time? He hasn’t thought about him in so many years. The only memories he’s had of him was in college. God only knows that he probably hasn’t remembered Ren in so long either.  
  
Ren sat up from the bed with Stimpy sound asleep next to him. Ren’s face wrinkled on how stupid Stimpy looks when he’s sleeping. Mouth fully opened with drool seeping out along with obnoxious snores that are loud enough to wake up a rock. Ren rolled his eyes, feeling that his throat was dry and got himself off the bed to get himself something to drink. That name. Johnathan. He couldn’t remember his full name, but his first name was almost the only quality that he could think of. It bothered him to no end that he couldn’t think of anything else. His face. His clothes. His voice. Everything. What was he doing? Where is he? How is he doing? Ren may never know. The frustrated man sighed deeply and got himself a glass of water and chugged it down just so he could go to bed. Before he could head off to bed, he caught something at the corner of his eye. Something was sticking out of the garbage can. Ren turned himself around to see that it was a light brown letter. An unopened light brown letter.  
  
“What the fuck?” Ren’s eyebrow rose as he walked towards the garbage can to retrieve the letter.  
  
His eyes read who it was from, and to his absolute surprise, it was from Johnathan. Johnathan Parsh. Ren cursed himself that he couldn’t even remember a last name so simple but yet so stupid. With his heart racing, he swiftly opened the letter. He ended up ripping the envelope in pieces due to excitement but made sure the letter itself wasn’t ripped. Ren pulled it out and began to unfold it. Jonathan’s handwriting has changed so much. It was so much cleaner and more professional looking than any other handwriting of anybody’s else’s that he could recall.  
  
Dear Ren,  
  
Hey, Buddy! It’s been an such a long time since we’ve last talked together. It’s pretty vague to me but from what I could remember we pretty much parted ways after our career choices took the best of our times. I don’t want you to think that I didn’t talk to you because I hated you or anything. That’s not it at all. I thought a lot about you recently, and if it’s not any trouble I would love to talk to you again. Maybe have a little chat over the phone or meet somewhere? You think about it, and whatever you choose to do I’ll can respect that. My number is at the bottom if you need anything!  
  
From, Johnny a.k.a Johnathan    
  
“Really? He thought it was necessary to add in ‘also known as’? Fuckin’ dork.” Ren chuckled quietly, now remembering how much of a dork he was back then.  
  
Despite Johnathan being a complete prankster and a daredevil back in college, he liked to have things done in a certain way. He was a huge perfectionist. If certain pranks didn’t do well he would do them countless times again and again just so it could go perfectly according to his plans. Ren never really complained. As long as someone was getting pranked then that’s all he needed. Probably some tears and a bit of blood from time to time. That’s how Ren usually liked it. It was usually how he did things with Johnathan. The question remained if he really wanted to call him. At this hour even? Well, why not? Nothing exciting has been happening lately, so Ren looked down to see Johnathan’s number on the bottom of the paragraph. Knowing Johnathan, he would have to be up at this time since he’s been up late during college many times before. It was practically one of his top bad habits.  
  
Ren picked up the phone and pressed the numbers that were addressed from the letter, awaiting for an answer. All of the memories of them being in college together came flooding back. It almost felt nostalgic that it made him feel sickly happy. Almost too happy to be exact. Those good times … years ago ..

 

_Ren!_

  
_Ren!!_  
  
_Hey, wait up, asshole!_  
  
_Ren turned himself around to see that it was Johnathan that was calling his name with large text books tightly secured in his arms. Johnathan was panting and huffing from following Ren that was halfway up a hill that wasn’t too far along the campus grounds. What Ren wanted to do up there was anybody’s guess, but they knew that it was his spot to go to and that nobody even dared to steal it … friends accepted of course._  
  
_“Dude, I called your name like fifty fuckin’ times and you didn’t even turn around.” Johnathan panted, trying to catch his breath._  
  
_Ren couldn’t help but laugh at his friends trying attempts to stop himself from wheezing, but his expression and the sounds he was making was just too priceless._  
  
_“Well, maybe you shouldn’t carry those books, idiot. And maybe lose a little weight.” Ren chuckled._  
  
_“Oh, shut the fuck up, dick face. I’m not fat like your sidekick, Stimpy.” Johnathan harshly remarked, walking up ahead pass Ren with his nose up in the air._  
  
_Somehow hearing Johnathan calling Stimpy his “sidekick” struck a nerve and not in a defendable way either._  
  
_“What the fuck made you think he was my sidekick? Stimpy isn’t my anything. He’s just … there, y’know?” Ren said, catching up with Johnathan beside him._  
  
_“Don’t give me any of that bullshit, Ren. He follows you around, constantly calls you ‘Renny’, feeds food to you, hugs you, and just BEING there. Doesn’t that annoy you?” Johnathan’s eyebrow rose, “Knowing you I would say that it isn’t like you to hang around a clingy fat sack of shit like him.”_  
  
_Ren gave Johnathan an expressionless face, but the bursted out in laughter. Rather than taking this serious as he should, he couldn’t help but sense a twinge of jealousy that was coated in Johnathan’s words as he stated the reasons why he thinks that Stimpy is annoying._  
  
_“Johnny, if I didn’t know better I would have to say that you’re jealous. Lime-green jealous.” Ren grinned, reaching on top of the hill and taking a seat on the soft grass beneath him._  
  
_Johnathan stopped in his tracks as he couldn’t believe of what Ren just told him. The way he said it too so confidently pissed him off even more. Instead of letting his rage control his emotions anymore, he rolled his eyes and joined Ren at the top of the peaceful hill._  
  
_“It’s envy you’re thinking about. Green with envy which is an emotion that runs on desires the things that another person has. Jealousy is a totally different emotion based on the fear of losing someone or something, and that is something that I’m not. Dumbass.” Johnathan stated, placing his books next to his side._  
  
_“Psh, whatever, smartass.” Ren gave Johnathan a cocky smile while playfully punching his arm._  
  
_“I’m serious though. There’s nothing that I envy about Stimpy nor am I jealous of him, okay? Just … fuckin’ drop it.” Johnathan pulled his knees closer to his chest._  
  
_Ren knew very well that Johnathan was an open book of emotion. He could always tell if he was sad, happy, angry, and even jealous. To Ren, it was pathetic, but at the same time, sympathetic. He sighed and crossed his arms._  
  
_“Dude, you know that I hang out with you just as much as I do with Stimpy. We’ve known each other for an extremely long time, so of course he’s gonna be clingy to me. I’m pretty much one of his only friends.” Ren explains._  
  
_“You’re my only friend too, y’know ….” Johnathan mumbles, “You’re the only person that I can fully trust. You get me. Above all of it, I always have so much fun with you.”_  
  
_Ren blinked and just stared at his friend. He was saying it like Ren was dying or something. It was weirding him out, but he understood how he felt. Stimpy and Johnathan were possibly the only two people that could spend an entire week with him and not have themselves become either bored or extremely irritated with his constant reckless and rebellious behavior. It was a miracle that they didn’t stop hanging out with him sooner. He secretly admired the both of them for tolerating him for so long._  
  
_“Jesus Christ, will you fucking relax? It’s not like I’m gonna die of a terminal illness tomorrow or somethin’. I’m always gonna be around, Johnny. We’ll always be pals, you n’ I, so quit being a dickless baby and just enjoy the upcoming summer breeze.” Ren chuckled, leaning back looking at the cloudless sky._  
  
_He tilted his head back at Johnathan to see him still looking rather down. Ren sighed but smiled none the less._  
  
_“Hey, ….” Ren placed his hand ontop of Johnathan’s, “It’ll be okay, ….. smartass.”_  
  
_Johnathan felt the sudden warmth of Ren’s hand on his, making his face flush of red. He looked at the subtle smile that Ren had on his face and couldn’t help but crack up, leaving Ren confused._  
  
_“What?!? I’m trying to be supportive here, you ungrateful shit!” Ren pounded his fists on Johnathan’s arm._  
  
_“Ahaha! That smile does not suit you at all! It makes you look like a total creepo!” Johnathan continued to burst into a fit of uncontrollable laughter._  
  
_“Fuck! You!”_  
  
_The two older teenagers laughed and rough housed one another before they could watch the white clouds roll into the blank blue sky. Johnathan could’ve sworn he had to go to a class, but watching the clouds seemed like a better idea. It may seemed childish to others, but to them it was a moment on they wished would last forever._  
  
_But good things don’t last forever …._  
  
_Do they?_


	2. Chapter 1.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please know that I do not own Ren and Stimpy for they belong to Nickelodeon while Johnathan is my character. I also do not own any music lyrics that will/are mentioned in some chapters. I do this for purely entertainment, no fund gains whatsoever~ This is a slash fanfiction of Ren and Stimpy and does have my R/S OC Johnathan on which will be more fleshed out than he was in my old fanfiction. This will have OCxCanon Character moments but I reassure you that this is an Ren/Stimpy fanfic. Also please be warned that this fanfiction does contain material that might make some readers uncomfortable as it discusses violence, sex, abuse, and drugs and alcohol so viewer discretion is advised.

The early morning arrived faster than Ren could imagined. Another night of restless sleep. It would’ve been fine any other day, but this day was important since Ren’s college buddy, Johnathan, was coming. He wanted to be in the right mood when he would come over. Ren looked at the alarm clock and saw that it was 8 o'clock sharp. He turned off the alarm before it could even set itself off. With a harsh sigh he pushed the covers and sheets off of him and sat on the edge of the bed where he gave himself a few minutes to wake up. Ren looked behind him and saw that Stimpy was already up and at ‘em. From the looks of it, he took a shower and everything. This surprised Ren because Stimpy was the one to always sleep until the early afternoon. Why would he wake up so early? It was beyond Ren. He shrugged the thought off and go off the bed to start the day. He grabbed some clean clothes and made his way to the bathroom to feel that it was humid and had the old scent of Stimpy. **  
**

“Fuckin’ disgusting ….” Ren groaned, seeing bits of short red hair almost everywhere on the floor. “Start of the fuckin’ day. I get it.”

Ren stripped off his dirty night clothes and threw them in the laundry basket. Turning on the water, he brushes his long blonde hair before getting behind the shower curtains. Looking himself in the mirror, seeing how physically skinny he is, he hated it. There wasn’t a sign of any muscles that stuck out from the rest on any part of his body. It was embarrassing, but for a small fellow like him he sure knows how to throw a few good punches towards Stimpy.

“Idiot …..” Ren grumbled to himself, hoping inside the shower and rinsing his hair first.

It didn’t take long before the warm water would run out leaving Ren completely cold in the shower. He would turn the water knob from inch to inch to scavenge the last warm water there was before Ren was even done. This left him more pissed off than he can handle. It could only get worse from here. He turned the water off and gotten his towel that seemed somehow completely soaked. Stimpy had forgotten to use his own towel …. again.

“Alright, that’s fine. That’s fuckin’ fine. I’ll use his towel. See how he fuckin’ likes it.” Ren chuckled, thinking he solved some master plan just to get back at his roommate.

Once he’s gotten himself dried off from Stimpy’s towel, freezing, he grabbed his clean work clothes that was neatly folded and placed on the bed for him. Stimpy must’ve put these out for him. At least that’s one thing that makes him less useless as he is now. Cooking, cleaning, and making sure the house was in shape seems to be his only given talent besides being stupid. Ren wasn’t really sure why he decided to make Stimpy his roommate instead of Johnathan, but he knew that the question remained unknown to him. From what Johnathan said on the phone it wasn’t that he was mad with him, but was just too focused on his career, on which Ren can understand on his part. He too was busy. Busy avoiding people. Ren lightly chuckled at the thought. He wasn’t exactly the most extroverted person in the world, and he still isn’t. Ren liked being alone. He sought solace into it. Would he feel lonely? Perhaps, but still better than being with people.

“Rennyyyyy! Breakfast is ready!!” Stimpy called from downstairs, his voice sounding alive and joyful.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah ….” Ren rolled his eyes as he straightened his work tie.

Just hearing his obnoxious high voice was enough to give him a headache, and that’s not something that Ren would want right now. Just grin and bear it until he arrives. He sighs and carefully walks downstairs avoiding the messy obstacles that Stimpy left behind. What was waiting beneath the steps was a giant bear hug that Ren could’ve sworn he felt a few bones crack.

“Goodmorning, sweetheart!!” Stimpy giggles, giving his roommate sloppy kisses on the cheek.

“Augh!! Get off of my you fuckin’ fat sack of shit!” Ren groaned in disgust, trying to get out of Stimpy’s bear-like grip.

Stimpy quickly let Ren go as he was told and lead him in the kitchen, excited to show him the breakfast that he made for him. The sweet and savory aroma filled Ren’s nose along side with a cup of freshly brewed coffee. It was a quaint little setting that Stimpy has made for him, and to his surprise, Ren liked it.

“I made ya some breakfast, Ren! I hope you like it! I added a little bit of brown sugar on the bacon so it’ll give the savory taste a little kick!” Stimpy stated, looking so proud of himself.

“Great, thanks.” Ren gave Stimpy a fake smile before taking his seat at the table.

Truth be told, the food on his plate really did look appetizing, but Ren above all was too nervous to really eat. Johnathan was coming over to walk with him to work and god only knows what will happen from there. How much has John changed? What will he look like? He won’t know until he arrives. The wait just made him more anxious though. He slightly pushes away his plate and takes a few sips of his coffee. At least the coffee tasted good to him.

“Why are you up so early, Renny? I heard you get up but usually you don’t wake up until eight?” Stimpy sits next to him with his own plate.

“I have plans.” Ren took another sip of his coffee, not meeting eyes with Stimpy.

“Oh? If you don’t mind me asking, what plans?” Stimpy asked, an innocent smile spreading on his face.

“Someone is walking with me to work today and we’re gonna hang out when I’m done with work.” Ren sighed.

Stimpy’s eyebrow rose as he began to question on who was going to walk him roommate to work. It became odd to him because usually Ren would always want to walk by himself to the factory considering that it’s only a few blocks down. Stimpy thought about it for a few minutes and could only think of one person.

“Is that someone … me?” Stimpy asked Ren, his cheeks blushing.

Ren then looked at Stimpy hard in the eyes with those tired blood-shot eyes that almost made Stimpy shiver in intimidation.

“Ooohhh Yeeaaaaahhhh, Stimpy! You’re coming with me to work when there’s so much you should be doing to keep the house going! And while we’re at it, we can fuckin’ frolic through the meadow or some shit!” Ren said in the most sarcastically joyful expression possible.

“Really??”

“No!”

From that, Ren rolled up the daily newspaper and hit Stimpy on the head with all his might.

“You fuckin’ idiot! I’m walkin’ with Johanthan!” Ren growled, watching Stimpy quickly react to the harsh whack on the head.

“OOooooowww! Reeeeeen!! That really hur— Wait, ….” Stimpy stopped rubbing his head, his eyes in complete disbelief. “You’re walking …. with Johnathan??? Why???”

“Uhm, because I can? And I want to? Why the fuck do you care??” Ren raised his voice, not liking on how Stimpy is talking to him.

“Why do I care??? Ren, honestly! Johnathan has been and always be a bad influence on you! I just … don’t think that you should go with him.” Stimpy stated, his face filled with hurt and confusion.

“Who I walk with to work is MY fuckin’ business! You don’t have any god damn right to tell me who I can or can’t walk with, Stimpy! Jesus fucking Christ! You never even knew the god damn guy!”

“I know enough of the bad things that he’s done in college, Ren! You don’t even know if he’s changed or not! I just don’t want you to get hurt, Renny ..” Stimpy reached out to cup Ren’s cheek.

“Don’t fucking touch me!!” Ren swiftly swiped Stimpy’s hand away. “Maybe next time you oughta think before you throw away letters that are addressed to me, idiot.”

Stimpy’s heart skipped a beat when he heard Ren say that last sentence. How could he have known? He was certain that he threw away the letter.

“B-But …. H-”

“Uhhh, it was sticking out of the trash when I went downstairs for a drink, fuckin’ stupid.” Ren threw the newspaper roll at him. “Next time, I’m taking care of the mail. When I get home they fucking better be on the kitchen counter!!”

Stimpy flinched from the newspaper being tossed at him along with Ren’s tone becoming more threatening. His eyes stung of tears. He tried his best not to cry as he looked at Ren with those glassy innocent eyes of his.

“I- …. I-I’m sorry ……”

_Knock_

_Knock_

_Knock_

That must be Johnathan. Ren shook his head, shoving away the anger in his chest, grabs his coat, and makes his way to the door. He opens it and finds a rather … odd surprise.

“Heeeeeyyyy, dude!!!” Johnathan exclaims in excitement and tightly hugs Ren around his neck. “Oh my god, it’s been too long!!”

“J-Johnny??” Ren questions, extremely confused on how different Johnathan looks.

“Yeap! It’s me!” Johnathan chuckles, loosening his grip and fully presents himself in front of him.

Johnathan has changed so much since the last time he saw him. Usually he would wear some nerdy attire that was often a chick repellant back in the day, but now he looks like what a rebellious kid would look like. His hair was shoulder length instead of that awkward buzz cut that dads would give to their kids to make them look “tough”. His shirt was a stripped black and gray with a few holes here and there along side with dark blue jeans that were decorated in tiny chains. It all finished off with dark brown greaser style boots. Just what exactly did Johnathan get his fashion advice from? Of course people do change in certain amount of years, but this was just so weird for Ren to soak in. Not to mention how Johnathan had more than a few piercings on his face.

“Wow, … you’ve changed, Johnny. A-ah, not that I mean that in a bad way! It’s just been so long since I’ve last saw ya, and I just ….. like wow ….” Ren staggered, sheepishly chuckling as he rubbed the back of his neck.

“Dude, you think you’re the only one weirded out? You’re wearing a work suit for Christ sake! Knowing you I would think you would be the last person on earth to wear something like that!” Johnathan laughed.

“Hey, shut up, you fuckin’ nerd!” Ren laughed along, hearing that Stimpy started doing the dishes behind them.

“Oh! Is that Stimpy?” Johnathan looked over at Ren’s shoulder.

“Yeah it is. Let’s go …” Ren lowered his head.

“Shouldn’t I say ‘hi’ or somethin’?” Johnathan shrugged, looking rather concerned.

“No. Let’s. Go.” Ren huffed, lightly shoving Johnathan out of the way.

Johnathan nodded, knowing that he can never really have Ren go into an argueing fit. As soon as Ren stepped out of the house, Johnathan looked inside to see that Stimpy was still cleaning the dishes. He didn’t even say “goodbye” or “be careful” to him. Johnathan didn’t really know what to say but just close the door behind him, not knowing that Stimpy bursts into tears with both hands on his face as soon as he was sure that they were gone.


	3. Chapter 2.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please know that I do not own Ren and Stimpy for they belong to Nickelodeon while Johnathan is my character. I also do not own any music lyrics that will/are mentioned in some chapters. I do this for purely entertainment, no fund gains whatsoever~ This is a slash fanfiction of Ren and Stimpy and does have my R/S OC Johnathan on which will be more fleshed out than he was in my old fanfiction. This will have OCxCanon Character moments but I reassure you that this is an Ren/Stimpy fanfic. Also please be warned that this fanfiction does contain material that might make some readers uncomfortable as it discusses violence, sex, abuse, and drugs and alcohol so viewer discretion is advised.

There was an uncomfortable silence between Ren and Johnathan. Johnathan didn’t really know if Ren wanted to talk about the whole situation between him and Stimpy, but he was too curious to know on what’s going on. He just needed to choose his words carefully.

“So, uh, what’s goin’ on between you and Stimpy? You guys roommates or something?” Johnathan asked breaking the silence.

Ren grabbed a carton of cigarettes out his pants pocket and grabbed two out giving one to Johnathan in which he thanked for.

“What about it? We’re just roommates. After I got my diploma I was able to get a decent job, but because the hours are extremely long and shitty I never had the time to clean or cook for myself. So, Stimpy was the only idiot that was available that was actually able to do those things for me. He’s annoying as fucking shit, but hey, he does know how to make a good meal.” Ren said, lighting his cigarette along with Johnny’s.

“Oh, I see. So, you guys aren’t together? Like, in a relationship or something?” Johnathan asked, suddenly regretting those questions.

Ren unsettlingly rose his eyebrow at Johnathan. Ren can see why Johnathan would be curious if they were roommates or not but to assume that they were in a relationship? That just came off odd to Ren. The strange thing is that Ren didn’t know how to answer that question. Were they? Stimpy would occasionally hug him and kiss him, but those could mean anything, right? Ren let out an annoyed sighed and took a long drag out of his cigarette.

“As if.” He bluntly sighed, letting the thick white smoke escape through his teeth and lips.

Johnathan felt a slight pressure in his stomach as if it was to say “that’s a bit harsh”, but he didn’t need to say so otherwise. In a way, he was actually a bit happy they weren’t, but again he didn’t feel the need to say so.

“Ah. This might be a hunch, but he seems to really like you though.” Johnathan said, tapping his cigarette so the ash would come off.

“He likes everybody, Johnathan. It’s hard to tell who he is and isn’t in love with. The only difference between me and everybody is that about a hundred times more annoying when he’s with me. Doesn’t sound like love to me.” Ren chuckled.

Johnathan gave out a disagreeing frown. He knew very well that people act much differently when they’re around the people that they deeply care for. It was clear to him that Ren was extremely oblivious to this, but due to his own feelings, he didn’t want to correct him.

“In fact, you know what the fuck he did last night? That mother fucker threw away the letters that you sent me! The dumbass wasn’t smart enough to dump the trash on top of the letters just so I couldn’t see it. I found them literally sticking out of the garbage can like he thinks he got away scot free. That’s why I was so pissed off at him this morning. You pretty much saw that.” Ren growled.

“What? Really? He did that? That’s not cool, dude. I mean, I guess I can see why considering that I wasn’t a decent kid back in the day and wasn’t the best influence on you, but I’ve changed now. People change as years go on. I guess I got to really prove that to him don’t I?” Johnathan grinned sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand.

“He still owes you a fucking apology though. That I do know.” Ren took another long drag, throwing the butt on the ground and stepping on it before continuing their walk.

“Well, maybe, but you don’t have to be harsh on him.” Johnathan hummed.

Ren looked over at Johnathan with a disgust and slightly confused expression before shaking his head with an apathy smirk.

“You’ve grown soft, Johnny boy.” Ren cruelly chuckled.

“No, I’ve just grown up is all. It pretty much shows at this point.” Johnathan sighed putting his hands in his pocket.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? What? Is being the same as before a bad thing now? I fucking got the job that I wanted because of my ‘anger issues’ and not taking anybody’s shit. You’re not going to go far in life if you’re weak and fucking nice. I always get what I want because of who I am, and nothing will change that. So, don’t fucking tell me if I should just ‘grow up’ because my attitude doesn’t fit in your perfect preferences.” Ren snarled through his teeth with his blood shot eyes glaring daggers at Johnathan.

This caused Johnathan to flinch back a bit. Honestly, Johnathan was hoping that Ren would’ve been a bit more light-hearted. Friendly and possibly happier too, but he can see that Ren is still the same Ren that he remembers back in college, and that’s what really bothers him. Disappointing, really.

“Alright, Alright, God! Forget I said anything.” Johnathan snapped back, “Geez ….”

Ren huffed and got another cigarette out, quickly lightening it before taking a rushed drag. This got awkward pretty fast and Ren was already starting to feel bad. Not really regretting what he said, but considering that Johnathan was here on a special visit, he was supposed to make a good first impression. Now he fucked it all up. Might as well just swallow his pride and apologize without sounding sarcastic.

“Sorry, man. Didn’t mean to bitch at you like that.” Ren grumbled under his smoke filled breath, looking at the gravel ground below.

Johnathan’s expression softens a bit but didn’t give out a smile as he would’ve wanted to.

“Nah. It’s cool, dude. Just keep your temper in check next time and I won’t complain about your lifestyle.” Johnathan bumped his shoulder against Ren playfully.

“No promises.” Ren returned the bump with a tiny grin.

~*~*~*~*

Stimpy sat on the couch while flipping the channels to see what was on. So far, nothing. It was too early for his favorite cartoons to show anyways. He turned the television off and went around to see what needed to be cleaned. The living room was free of crumbs and dust bunnies and the bathrooms are all tidied up. He looked in the kitchen to see the lone plate of cold scrambled eggs and bacon that belonged to Ren. He thought that Ren would change his mind and come back to eat a little bit just so he wouldn’t get hungry during work. It was now clear to him that he won’t be coming back. Stimpy sighed, picking up the plate and disposing the food into the trash. He then placed the dirty dish into the sink to be cleaned. What a waste, he thought. All of the food that he makes for Ren were all made from the heart. He knows after a hard day at work he would want to be welcomed home to a wonderful meal waiting for him.

“Wait … that’s it!” Stimpy snapped his fingers after drying his hands from cleaning the plate, “I’ll just make Ren a marvelous dinner! It’ll be so wonderful he’ll have to forgive me!”

Stimpy let out an excited squeal, heading to the kitchen to take out some chicken breasts from the refrigerator along with some chilled vegetables. Some fresh potatoes to make some homemade mashed potatoes and possibly some gravy to go along with the chicken as well. Stimpy’s mind was storming of ideas. It made his heart flutter to think about Ren’s happy face to see the glorious meal before him. To see that warm smile on his face and possibly giving him a kiss on the cheek. It may also help Ren take his mind off of that delinquent Johnathan too. It was ridiculous to think of such a thing, but it’s worth a try.

“Don’t worry, Renny. I’ll show you that I can be useful.” Stimpy said while getting started on the chicken.


	4. Chapter 3.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please know that I do not own Ren and Stimpy for they belong to Nickelodeon while Johnathan is my character. I also do not own any music lyrics that will/are mentioned in some chapters. I do this for purely entertainment, no fund gains whatsoever~ This is a slash fanfiction of Ren and Stimpy and does have my R/S OC Johnathan on which will be more fleshed out than he was in my old fanfiction. This will have OCxCanon Character moments but I reassure you that this is an Ren/Stimpy fanfic. Also please be warned that this fanfiction does contain material that might make some readers uncomfortable as it discusses violence, sex, abuse, and drugs and alcohol so viewer discretion is advised.

Ren and Johnathan arrived at the factory just in time. Johnathan took his gaze all around the factory and didn’t really looked impressed.

“Damn, Ren. This factory let’s out more smoke then you on a daily basis.” Johnathan teasingly laughs.

“Oh hardie har har, smartass. The day that hell freezes is the day that I give a shit on what you have to say about my habits. Besides, you smoke yourself, you hypocrite.” Ren opened the doors letting himself in before holding the door as Johnathan follows him.

“Well, yeah, barely. I know that you didn’t pay attention in health class back in high school but I’ll spare you the details until you get cancer at the age of forty.” Johnathan shrugs, “So, at some point you are gonna have to give a shit before you croak.”

“I probably won’t.” Ren scoffed.

Johnathan shook his head and refrained himself from saying anything more. Ren is just as stubborn and ignorant as he was back in college. One would think that having to live on one’s own and maintaining a full-time job they would’ve taken things more seriously, but Ren is just as careless with his health more than anything. Drinking, smoking, not eating nutritious foods often, and above all not getting as much sleep as he should have. Johnathan wanted to bring it up some more, but obviously he wouldn’t get anymore, at this point he would have to change the subject.

“Is the pay good here?” Johnathan asked, seeing how the furniture and the interior design of the building looked all futuristic.

Everybody seemed so snobbish. To the lines of the receptionists to the lounge room. It seems that everything is kept in a certain order, and that’s what makes it so unnerving to Johnathan. He felt so out of place. Especially with his current attire, he was already getting uncomfortable glances and glares. He tried to pay no mind to it and just kept to himself.

“It’s alright. It helps pay majority of the bills, so that’s a plus. The insurance isn’t all that bad either.” Ren unlocks the door to his office and let’s Johnathan go in first before himself.

Johnathan nodded and headed inside taking a seat with a relieved sigh.

“God, what is with all of these snobbish shit heads here? It’s like they saw the devil when I walked in with ya.” Johnathan said sinking into his seat.

Ren went behind his desk and pulled out a large folder from one of the drawers on the side and settled it on top of the desk. He sighed and opened it to get out the papers that needed to be reviewed and signed.

“It’s just how things are here. I don’t like it either but the ladies out there take it as an offense if you gave them a sketchy look wen its coming from you, so don’t worry about them. They’re all a bunch of snitching cunts anyways.” Ren sighed harshly, looking through one of the papers.

“Hmmm. Kind of reminds me when we had that one teacher back in high school. I remember that it was a US history class that she taught too. What was her name?” Johnathan ponders a bit.

“You mean Ms. Schmitt? Who could forget? She would always pick on me too just for chewing gum and drawing in my notebook.” Ren let out a slight chuckle before taking out his pen.

“Dude, you drew badly drawn dicks on the desk and kept yelling random ass words for no reason. Man, she was so pissed off that she actually whipped your ass with her metal ruler.” Johnathan shook his head, having one leg settle on top of the other.

“And that fucking shit hurt like hell too. It’s not my fault her lectures were boring and needed some entertainment installed. Good thing I got that bitch fired.” Ren grinned, having no remorse in it whatsoever.

“Oh yeah. You put pornography magazines in her desk. I was on her good side so I don’t have too much against her.” Johnathan rolled his eyes.

Ren had his eyes on Johnathan for a few seconds halting his writing and then back to where he was again. He’ll admit, he did envy Johnathan for his skills of manipulation and such an innocent façade that he displayed towards the other adults. He looked up to him so much. It was until college when Johnathan took things seriously. Too seriously. Of course he still idolized him for his charisma, but the other side when he would sometimes hit the books instead of hanging out with him often had Ren in a sense of doubt. Whenever he wouldn’t hang out with Johnathan, it was always Stimpy that would follow right behind him. Stimpy would always welcome him with hugs and kisses on the cheek. His embraces would always feel warm. Ren wasn’t always the affectionate type. He would always try to pry him off when Stimpy’s arms would be around him, but somehow, he can’t deny that it would make his heart skip a beat. The fact that Stimpy cared about him made him feel like he has some worth in this world. To keep going. It’s what has him wake up in the morning and eat Stimpy’s delicious food. To go on to work and to finish, coming home to a hug, a kiss, and then to dinner time. Come to think of it, it sounds more like they’re a married couple more than anything. Ren doesn’t like to think so, but of course Stimpy does. And that bothers him more than anything. Ren honestly doesn’t know what he wants relationship wise. To sleep with a bunch of women or to truly settle down with someone? Only time will tell.

“Not to change the subject or anything, but … you wanna go get a drink after you’re done for the day? Seems like you would need it.” Johnathan says, having his gaze up towards the ceiling.

After a few minutes have passed, no answer. Johnathan blinked and turned his head down to look at Ren who seemed in deep concentration, but towards his work. Johnathan can very much see that the way that Ren is by how he’s just moving his pen around the paper but not writing anything down.

“Ren. Hey, Earth to Ren. You in there?” Johnathan got out of his seat and waved his hand around Ren’s face, “Don’t leave me hanging now! I don’t want to be stuck here with your snobbish co-workers that probably make way more money than I do in a month!”

Ren jolted himself up from his trance. He didn’t realize it, but his cheeks were beating red. He would try to hide it but that would make him more flustered.

“You were having dirty thoughts weren’t cha? Heh, in a place like this, I don’t blame you. Your cheeks are all red just like how it was back in high school when you needed to mentally distract yourself. You should probably hide your boner before the stuck ups outside see it.” Johnathan snickered.

“Oh hardie fucking har, you pervert.” Ren threw a spare pen at him.

Ren would say that he actually didn’t have a boner, but he wasn’t in the mood to argue. He just shrugged it off and finished the unsigned papers one by one.

“So, you said something about getting some drinks?” Ren asked, thinking about it for a second, “Yeah. I would actually like to.”

Johnathan couldn’t help but frown at the answer. Ren responded so quickly without having any hesitation in it at all.

“W-well, only if you want to. I wouldn’t want you to get into any trouble with Stimpy. He seems like the worried type if you’re out all night.” Johnathan smiled understandably.

“So? I’m sure the fucker can handle a night on his own. He’ll have the whole house to himself a bit more. It’s no big deal, really. After the shit that he pulled on me, I need some more time away from him.” Ren huffed, placing a signed paper into the out bin.

“That … doesn’t seem like a good idea, Ren. I know for a fact that Stimpy doesn’t like me and to have you get a couple of drinks at a bar without you telling him would have him lose his shit! I just … don’t want to be into any more trouble than what I already am with him. Can’t you at least call him?” Johnathan begged.

Ren raised his eyebrow. Begging seemed out of character for Johnathan, but he sounded very serious. After all, he just wants to spend more time with Ren as he possibly can before heading back home in a couple of days. Ren just sighed and nodded.

“Alright, alright, I’ll call the fat fuck just so you can stop that pathetic begging.” Ren said with a slight disgusted expression on his face, “Never in my life would I imagine you begging.”

Johnathan sighed with relief and took Ren’s hand in his.

“Thanks, buddy …” Johnathan said happily.

Ren looked up at Johnathan with their noses now practically inches away from each other. Ren never noticed this, but the way that Johnathan’s light brown eyes were glistening was just phenomenal. They were beautiful. Calm and filled with happiness it was making Ren flustered again. Aw geez, not again, he thought. He slipped his hand away from Johnathan’s.

“Don’t get all gay on me now.” Ren looked away, gritting his teeth, “Now go sit down and let me finish these. Wouldn’t want the beer to go warm now would we?”

“Ohhhh no, we wouldn’t want that to happen.” Johnathan exaggeratedly said before snickering.

Johnathan took his seat as he lets his mind wonder to help kill time. He would ask Ren on how long it’ll take him before he finished up, but he wouldn’t want him to disturb him. From the looks of it, it could be a while.

*~*~*~*

Hours came by and went. Johnathan took the liberty of taking a nap since there was nothing to do in the office unless he wanted to annoy the shit out of Ren and get a good beating out of it. He was woken up by a few hard on the knocks on the head.

“Hey asshole, wake up!” Ren shouted, having a rather excited look on his face, “C’mon! C’mon! I’m all finished up! Let’s get the fuck out of here!”

Johnathan rubbed his eyes tiredly. He’s not really sure if he’s in the mood anymore to drink, but he couldn’t turn Ren down like that. The walk to the bar would probably help wake him up as well.

“Mmmm. Did you call Stimpy?” Johnathan yawned, getting up from his chair and stretched.

“Hmm? Oh, yeah. I did. While you were sleeping I went on a bathroom break and used my cell phone just so I wouldn’t disturb your peaceful slumber.” Ren grinned.

“Annndddd?” Johnathan blinked worriedly, “What did he say?”

Ren scratched his chin.

“Well, there was a bit of arguing here and there, but he gave in since you are here for not very long, right? C’mon, man, loosen up. It’s fine.” Ren patted Johnathan’s shoulder before walking out the door.

“A-ah, alright.” Johnathan hummed, smiling none the less.

He followed Ren out the door as he looked to the ground in attempt to ignore the receptionist’s glares. He could even hear them whispering to each other on how he looked like a delinquent that would probably come back later to rob the factory. They all said each other to “be sure to lock up when you leave” before returning to their places.

“Ooohhh, you can all go fuck yourselves and the pampered horses that you rode on.” Johnathan hissed under his breath.

“Don’t mind them, buddy. Tonight it’s just you, me, and the warm embrace of Jack Daniels that will soon go down our throats.” Ren winked at Johnathan, stepping out of the factory with Johnathan by his side.


	5. Chapter 4.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please know that I do not own Ren and Stimpy for they belong to Nickelodeon while Johnathan is my character. I also do not own any music lyrics that will/are mentioned in some chapters. I do this for purely entertainment, no fund gains whatsoever~ This is a slash fanfiction of Ren and Stimpy and does have my R/S OC Johnathan on which will be more fleshed out than he was in my old fanfiction. This will have OCxCanon Character moments but I reassure you that this is an Ren/Stimpy fanfic. Also please be warned that this fanfiction does contain material that might make some readers uncomfortable as it discusses violence, sex, abuse, and drugs and alcohol so viewer discretion is advised.
> 
> The lyrics below belong to Simon Curtis

It seemed to be days since Ren went to work. Stimpy continued to look at the phone and back, wondering when Ren would call. It wasn’t all that strange though as Ren would almost never call him to let Stimpy know that he was coming home after a long shift of work. If Ren was hurt he would’ve gotten a phone call right away to let him know what happened. Stimpy didn’t want to think of the worst case scenarios as to why Ren was running so late, but it was so hard. It would probably be a good time to call Ren now if he isn’t going to call him. Stimpy got out his metallic pink cell phone out and dialed his number.

_Ring ring_

_…._

_Ring ring_

_…_

_Ring ring_

_…_

_Hey, you’ve reached Ren Hoek. I’m probably not around right now or I’m busy working. Call back another time or never. I’d prefer it if you don’t._

_Beep!_

He didn’t pick up. This wasn’t unusual, but something inside told Stimpy that something wasn’t right. And then it hit him. Johnathan. He has to be the one that’s doing only god knows what to Ren. Holding hands? Kissing? Maybe something more? No. Of course not. Stimpy felt ridiculous for feeling so jealous over a longtime friend of Ren’s. Maybe Johnathan wasn’t as he used to be back then. He wasn’t sure of it, but one things for sure is that he won’t believe that until he’s seen it. Until Johnathan has genuinely apologized for it then it will lift up his worries. He just wished that he had the courage to tell Ren how he really feels. Stimpy doesn’t want to be just friends, but something so much more. Something more than just sharing the bed innocently and platonic cheek kisses. Sensual desire he thought. Possibly some sexual situations here and there, but would be commenced out of love. So cheesy, but so beautiful in Stimpy’s mind. Their bodies touching with fingers sliding and exploring every inch and crevice of the nude flesh. Their tongues and lips meeting as they moaned each’s others names. It made Stimpy’s face blush and his heart accelerating. He wanted him so badly, but knew that he would have to confess when the time is right. Stimpy’s determination shouldn’t be lowered just because Johnathan suddenly stepped in. He would have to be subtle about this without making it seem like it’s a competition. Hopefully, things will work out on its own.

“Oh, Renny …” Stimpy frowned, looking down at his phone.

He then turned his head towards the kitchen table filled with delicious food that was going cold. It would be a shame to throw it all away considering how hard he worked to make it. Stimpy just sighed, put his phone in his pocket, and went to the kitchen cupboards to get out the large plastic containers to store the food into the refrigerator for later.  As soon as the containers were in the fridge, he saw something that caught his eye on the fridge door just before he was about to close it. It was a picture. A photo of him and Ren when they were back in high school, genuinely smiling. Ren looked so healthy and happy from what it shows in the photo. No tired bags under his eyes and had short bright golden hair that was soft to the touch. Of course, Stimpy loves Ren no matter what he looks like, but it does show what years of cigarettes, alcohol, and long hours of work can do to one person alone. It would also explain why Ren has been so angry for so long, but that was just Stimpy’s theory. It could’ve been his fault for being so clingy and always being in his personal bubble. No, this isn’t time to be negative, he thought. Staring at his cellphone screen, he decides to leave a text to at least let Ren know that he’s worried about him.

_Hey Renny,_

_I know that you’re probably busy, but it’s getting very late and I’m starting to get extremely worried about you. Please, at least text me or call me to let me know that you’re doing okay. I’m sorry for annoying you with this, but please let me know soon._

Sent.

Stimpy increases the volume of his phone just in case he falls asleep before putting it back into his pants pocket. He sighs and sits himself down on the kitchen table settling his arms on it placing his chin on top. The entire house was quiet and lonely, leaving the large man to have himself be swallowed of the isolation.

~*~*~*~*~*

The entire building was filled with noise of deep bass and the overwhelming stench of sweat and cigarette smoke. Johnathan had taken Ren to a two story strip club that had a huge bar on the first floor and a strip show upstairs. The bar had numerous selections of alcohol that was a U shaped that was cut off in the middle of where the stairs was available to go upstairs. It didn’t smell as bad nor did it seem as dirty as Ren would mentally compare it to how would it look upstairs. There were a few men sitting at the bar just minding their own business as they suck down shots of whiskey. That’s exactly what Ren was here for. To just try to avoid the pep talk and to drink as much shots as he can before going home.

“This place smells of cheap whores, cigarettes, and what seems to be fresh sweat. I love it.” Ren smirked, taking a seat at the bar eagerly as he already started to order a couple of drinks.

“I knew you would,” Johnathan smiled at Ren’s enthusiasm and sat next to him as he grabbed his shot of Jack Daniels, “I’ve been here a few times from then and again, but I didn’t even know that it was so close by to where you work. It’s crazy.”

Ren downed the whiskey and ordered another one. The heat of the alcohol started to course through his body already making his fingers tingle and his head almost light as a feather.

“I mean, it’s not special, but you can’t beat the selections here.” Johnathan continued as he drank his shot, looking back at Ren and then to his glass.

“Oh shut the fuck up, man. It’s perfect. I can’t really remember the last time I went to a strip club that actually has some taste to it than some beat down shack that has puddles of piss everywhere. I missed this kind of freedom. It’s better than to settle down with some fuck that thinks that sitting around staring at a box of static is fun.” Ren rolls his eyes, “It’s refreshing.”

Johnathan swallowed hard as he knew that he was talking about Stimpy at the last sentence. Thinking about it more, how long has it been since Ren has really been out just for himself or with anybody else besides Stimpy. Of course Stimpy would never step in a place like this without coughing from the smoke or complaining about all of the health codes that the strip club could be violating. It’s understandable why Ren couldn’t go anywhere without having Stimpy being in the picture, but maybe that’s for the very best.

“I-I don’t know. Sometimes the whole ‘party’ life can be fun on the long run, but after a while it gets so repetitive that you just want to stop. It just clicks one day. Your mind just suddenly tells you that life is more than just drinking and sleeping around with the next person who’s willing to be your night stand. Looking back at it, it makes you feel like shit knowing you just wasted your life on meaningless crap.” Johnathan sighs, downing his whiskey.

Ren cocked his head as he rose his eyebrow. What was Johnathan talking about? What he was describing was a life that he wanted until responsibilities and peer pressure from parents was what had him have this boring office life. Ren wanted the constant adrenaline rush of partying everyday with beautiful girls by his side. The only “excitement” that he could ever get from work is a short birthday party for his manager or a co-worker, but no alcohol or loud music are ever allowed since it could ruin their focus after it’s over.

“What? Seriously? Man, I would fucking give away my arm for that kind of lifestyle. I fucking hate working in a boring ass office and to just go home all sedated from the excessive paper work. Not to mention living with a complete moron that can’t do bills worth shit.” Ren hissed through his breathe, drinking his third shot.

Hearing Ren talk like that is what made Jonathan slightly nervous. Maybe even more if it weren’t for the whiskey. He knew that Ren was a rambunctious kid and teenager growing up that would cause nothing but destructive trouble no matter where he went. It was bad enough that he was almost expelled from high school and nearly got arrested for starting a public fight after drinking an entire bottle of vodka in college. What would his life be like now if he continued to live as a rebellion with no discipline? Probably end up dead in a ditch, Johnathan thought.

“Maybe it wasn’t meant to be.” Johnathan said thinking out loud.

“Psh. ‘Wasn’t meant to be’, my fucking ass.” Ren scoffed, taking his fourth shot as he placed the empty shot glass on top of the other three empty shot glasses facing down.

Johnathan sighed, not really meant to get so deep with this conversation. He just wanted to have a good time with his friend that he hasn’t seen in years, and that’s exactly what they’re going to have. Just for one night. How bad could it be?

“C’mon Ren, let’s just have a good time not worry about our past regrets, okay? I’m only here for a few days.” Johnathan reminded, getting out his wallet.

He was right. Johnathan just got here and Ren hasn’t done much but just bitch all day about his work and shattered dreams. With an exaggerated groan, he grabbed Johnathan’s arm to halt him from getting out money from his wallet.

“Nah, I got this.” Ren insisted, taking out his wallet and placing a couple of ten dollar bills including a tip for the bartender on the counter, “Consider this as an apology for my jabbering.”

“Ren, you did—“

“Shut up. I wanted to, but I’m guessing you want to go home then, huh?”

“I ….. What? Dude, no. I was wondering if you wanted to go upstairs and dance for a while to shake off the worries. Watch the strippers dance on their poles while the music plays until our ears ring. If you want to, that is.” Johnathan shrugs, smiling a bit.

“Yeah. That sounds cool. Let’s fuck some shit up!” Ren lifted his arms in the air and got off his seat.

Johnathan laughed as he had no objections to it. Ren waited for Johnathan to get off his own seat and to lead Ren upstairs. The both can see that up the stairs awaits them darkness before they could reach the point. Despite being slightly intimidated by it, Johnathan was the first to go up having Ren to follow behind.

A few minutes with their feet up on the steps they could hear the music getting louder with a warm welcoming glow of purple up ahead. The noise of voices cheering, whistling, and laughter were as loud as the music having the both of feel comfortable enough to let their guard down a bit. Once they’ve reached to the top, they saw that it was a large crowd filled with enthusiastic drunks and men surrounding the strip stage with large amounts of money in their clammy eager hands. The music was beating in their ears with lights that flashed in rhythm with the beat drops. It wasn’t too overwhelming to cause problems but annoying enough to those who just want to sit and take a break.

“Boy, this room is packed!” Ren’s eyes shined from the lights along with being excited.

“Seems like they have the best girls out for tonight. Never in my life have I seen so many ugly ass guys hoard around a strip stage in one setting. Makes me feel bad for the ladies.” Johnathan commented, scratching his chin.

“If I were being payed to just take my clothes off I wouldn’t complain about it.” Ren bluntly states.

“Mmmm.” Johnathan hummed disapprovingly.

Ren looked around in the room to find a spot where they can dance freely and saw one that was right by a resting area where customers can sit and catch their breath before proceeding. He took Johnathan’s arm and dragged him to it.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down! These shoes don’t have that much resistance.” Johnathan chuckled nervously as he followed Ren.

“Oh, stop being such a little bitch and dance with me!” Ren laughed, bumping John with his hip.

Johnathan just laughed as he could tell that the whiskey was giving Ren the confidence that he needed. Al though it was hilarious to see Ren dancing with his work suit still on and having no idea what his dance moves are. Still, that’s one of the things that Johnathan liked about him. Just doing things freely without the worry about what others might think. He could honestly watch him have a good time forever with that happy drunk smile on his face. The way his eyes and hair shone from the lights above just seemed to make the entire room glow brighter. He was beautiful. In his own little world.

“What?” Ren slowed his movements for a minute as he noticed that Johnathan was just staring at him.

“N—nothing. S—sorry.” Johnathan rubbed the back of his neck.

His ears twitched as the current music started to slow down as a new song was starting to fade in. From what he could tell, it sounded rather retro but modern. Even if he didn’t know the song or not, he was beginning to like to already.

_What would you say if I said that I want you?_

_Would you laugh at me_

_and maybe think I was crazy?_

_‘Cause I don’t know any other way_

_than to say the way that I feel_

_But it doesn’t ever work_

_and it hurts to the bone_

_always feeling so damn alone_

The voice of the male singer sounded so sad and lonely that Johnathan found himself to relate to it already. Always wondering what would Ren say if he found out his true feelings for him. Would he laugh? Think he was weird? He wouldn’t know unless he asked, but he still had time. A few days here would give him enough courage to say so.

“C’mon! Join me!” Ren shouted, taking both of Johnathan’s hand and gently swinging him around.

“W—Whoa!! Ren!! A—ahaha!” Johnathan couldn’t help himself but laugh along with it.

_Is it so, so wrong to love?_

_Baby is it so, so wrong to love?_

_Is it so, so wrong to love_

_and to be loved in return?_

Ren had his grasp strong on his dancing partner’s hands so he wouldn’t let go. They felt so warm against his already sweaty hands which made his heart skip a beat. His hands were so small and delicate compared to Johnathan’s which were thicker and looked strong. It made him feel so incompetent, but he knew that John would never think of him like that. Nor would think any less of him no matter what he looked like.

 _The whiskey must really be fuckin’ me up to make me think like this,_ Ren thought.

But it was true. Sure, Johnathan wasn’t the most presentable person in the entire world, but he has his charms and his mature attitude to go along with it. It’s practically what made him stand out from the rest. He was beautiful in his own way. Along with those mesmerizing hazel eyes of his.

_I don’t know what to do_

_'cause I think that I need you_

_And I’m afraid 'cause intuition’s telling me_

_that you don’t feel the same_

_Ooh I wanna hold your hand_

_but I don’t think you understand_

_just how I’m feeling inside_

_Oh baby please don’t play with strings that dangle me_

_because I’d rather have nothing than lies_

The music kept going with the crowd around them dancing with their significant other or a dear friend with some of them even sobbing on another’s shoulder. Ren found this very amusing. He turned his head to notify it to Johnathan, only to see that he was met with a serious melancholy expression. It startled Ren a bit, but he kept his ground. He froze feeling Johnathan’s warm hands sliding up his arms, shoulders, then to gently cupping his cheeks. At this point, Ren’s heart was pounding hard against his chest making his face turn completely red. Their noses almost touching and their eyes locked on to each other.

“J—John?” Ren stuttered to break the silence, “You okay?”

_Is it so, so wrong to love?_

_Baby is it so, so wrong to love?_

_Is it so, so wrong to love_

_and to be loved in return?_

“Ren … I …..” Johnathan whispered, “I’m glad to be here. With you.”

What the hell was he going on about? As much as he found his words to be endearing Ren felt that Johnathan was trying compensate something. Something big but he looked too nervous to find the right words.

“I’m …. Glad to have you here too, man.” Ren blinked, hearing his heart beat drumming in his ears “U—Uh …”

“I’m sorry. I—I just ….”

“F-for what? This isn’t the first time you’ve ever been this w—weird.”

The tension is killing Ren at this point to where he’s certain that he’ll end up having a stroke by the time that Johnathan states his point in all this. He was so terrified and curious to where his stomach started to hurt. It didn’t feel good either considering that he just drank four shots of whiskey.

“J—Just tell me, honestly.” Johnathan frowned, taking his sight off of Ren for a moment.

“Y—yeah, what?” Ren smirked nervously.

“How do you … really feel about me?”

Oh.


	6. Chapter 5.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please know that I do not own Ren and Stimpy for they belong to Nickelodeon while Johnathan is my character. I also do not own any music lyrics that will/are mentioned in some chapters. I do this for purely entertainment, no fund gains whatsoever~ This is a slash fanfiction of Ren and Stimpy and does have my R/S OC Johnathan on which will be more fleshed out than he was in my old fanfiction. This will have OCxCanon Character moments but I reassure you that this is an Ren/Stimpy fanfic. Also please be warned that this fanfiction does contain material that might make some readers uncomfortable as it discusses violence, sex, abuse, and drugs and alcohol so viewer discretion is advised.

Ren’s expression melted into confusion as he was trying to soak into Johnathan’s sudden question. How does he feel about him? What kind of question is that? Here he is in a strip club just wanting to get drunk and having a good time when all of a sudden Johnathan pulls this out of the blue? Ren’s face then wrinkled in agitation as he was starting to get a headache. The people around him didn’t matter anymore as some of them even slightly touched him on the shoulder. The music was all a blur as his mind was just going back and forth.

“R-Ren?” Johnathan asked, now starting to regret asking.

The still party lights above began flashing. The music beat became louder along with the crowds cheering and unintelligible singing. The irritation grew bigger and bigger as Ren finally had enough and stormed off from the crowd and downstairs to the bar.

Johnathan blinked as he immediately felt guilty and stupid. He knew well that Ren really needed some time to unwind and to forget about everything for a while. In his mind it seemed like a good idea, but obviously from what Ren showed it really wasn’t. John sighed as he went to follow Ren down the stairs to see him standing outside next to a street light just outside the bar window. His ears drooped feeling the anxiety swell up in his chest. He could tell already that Ren was pissed off beyond belief.

“Oh boy.” Johnathan whispered to himself and went outside.

The cool air outside seemed to help Ren with his mild headache, but his head was still swimming with questions. He had heard Johnathan coming outside, but he didn’t want to look at him. He didn’t know what to say.

“Ren? A-are you okay?” Johnathan asked, concerned.

Of course he wasn’t, but he didn’t want to say. That question remained in his head of how he felt about him. Just the way that Johnathan was so sentimental about it made him question of what he really meant by that. Was Johnathan hiding something that Ren was oblivious to? Ren had known about Johnathan’s ever crush in high school and college and he had known that he was always too scared to confess his feelings towards them. Ren remembered too well how he would tell how much of a ‘pussy’ Johnathan was because he couldn’t ask a woman or even a man out on a date. It was pathetic, but somehow adorable. Ren would be in his own little world too much to really recognize his feelings towards his friends or even his own family. How was he supposed to feel? Looking back at him, he has grown to be quite a handsome man. The nervous nerd has grown much taller and slightly built. His beautiful hazel eyes that wasn’t hidden from his soft chocolate brown hair anymore was filled with life in them. Definitely the perfect image of a lady’s man. Here he is with his scrawny body and having his face aging quickly because of the constant smoking and alcohol consumption. Whatever made him feel good and to forget the worlds bullshit he didn’t give a care in a world about his looks.

“R-ren, I’m really sorry if I freaked ya out back there. I-it wasn’t my intention. I’m really sorry.” Johnathan said with his gaze on the ground, walking a bit closer to Ren.

Ren blinked, snapping back from his little world of thoughts and sighed, his breathe showing from the cold air. He reached his hand to the back of his jean pockets. Ren tapped it, his eyes widening to find out that something is missing.

“Aw shit!!” Ren exclaimed checking his other pocket only to find what he was looking for wasn’t in there either.

“W—what?! What is it?” Johnathan jumped from the sudden outburst as he goes to Ren’s aid.

“I think I dropped my fucking smokes at the strip club. God damn it. Those were unopened too.” Ren pouted, gritting his teeth.

Johnathan stood there motionless with his eyes going completely blank. After a few quiet minutes pass by, Johnathan breaks down laughing. Ren was surprised but was quickly becoming annoyed as to what the hell Johnathan was laughing about.

“The fuck is so funny?” Ren growled, putting his hands awkwardly in his front jean pockets.

“N-nothing! You just scared the shit out of me for the sake of your cigarettes being gone! Ahahaha!! Only you, Ren, only you.” Ren wiped a tear from his eye having a grin on his face, “It’s just as funny as the time when you found out that your entire whiskey stash was gone back in college.”

“Hey! That shit wasn’t fucking funny! Do you know how expensive aged whiskey is? My fucking asshole dad kept it all to himself when he found out.” Ren shook his head, remembering it all too well.

“Oh c’mon it was pretty funny!” Johnathan snickered, trying so hard to calm himself down.

“Yeah, until the bastard gave me a black eye and a broken arm.”

That’s when Johnathan stopped laughing and looked at Ren with both sympathy and shock.

“He …. He did that to you?” Johnathan frowned, the split guilt that was in his chest came back heavier than ever.

“Mmhm, but to be fair I did give him a good bruising from punching him so hard. We were both so pissed at each other that we ended up passing out after all that raging, screaming, and punching. After waking up, I remember my mom crying hysterically calling for an ambulance. We were released from the hospital the next day and he grabbed the first bottle of whiskey that his hand could find and just downed it. I took some time off from my classes for a while to let my arm heal. The fucker didn’t even think to share after all that happened.” Ren rubbed his eyes tiredly.

“Geez, …..” Johnathan rubbed the back of his neck, “That’s ……”

“Fucked up. I know, dude. I know. Explains me a lot about me, doesn’t it?”

Indeed, it did, Johnathan thought. Ren’s parents were far from perfect. They failed many times to realize the wrongs of Ren when he had done terrible things from his very early childhood to his years of being a young adult. From torturing innocent animals as a kid to literally almost beating someone close to death as an adult. Sure, he had friends, but after they would see him at his absolute worse they would quickly avoid him. All except for Johnathan and Stimpy. He lacked proper discipline, professional help, but mostly the supportive family that he needed. It was all sad, really.

Johnathan softly sighed as he walked up to Ren and patted his shoulder.

“C’mon. Let’s walk it out.” Johnathan smiled, walking ahead of Ren.

As much as Ren didn’t want this night to end already, a walk does sound rather nice. They weren’t far from home, but with some slow pacing it could take them little over a half hour to reach it. Ren rolled his eyes before following behind Johnathan. He looked up at the sky above to see the clear night sky, but no stars. Being an outskirts of a city, it’s not surprising.

“What about yours?” Ren spoke, his voice tired and quiet.

“Hmm? About what?” Johnathan turned his head towards Ren.

“Your parents. I mean, I’ve only seen them a few times in my life. I know that they don’t like me at all.” Ren chuckled, “But how have they’ve been?”

Johnathan opened his mouth to say something, but he closed it.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Johnathan shuffled his hands into his jean pockets.

Ren looked over to him to make a joke, but then saw the melancholy expression on his friend’s face. He quickly dropped it.

“Ah, alright.” Ren shrugged, now really tempting to run back into the club to get his smokes.

“M-Maybe some other time.” Johnathan offered.

“Whatever you want, man.”

*~*~*~*~

The rest of the walk was silent and awkward, but the two seemed to enjoy each other’s company with the crickets chirping and the street lights softly dimming the road. They’ve arrived home in one piece which left Ren realizing something.

“You’re staying at a hotel, right?” Ren looked at Johnathan before getting out the house key from underneath the door mat.

“Oh, yeah. I’m staying near the one that’s actually a block away from the strip club. You can’t miss it.” A smile returning to Johnathan’s lips.

“Eugh, the Underlook Hotel? Isn’t that where most graduates go to before their prom? I heard a guy was murdered in there.” Ren’s face wrinkled but couldn’t help but display a cheeky grin at the last sentence.

“Well, you know me. I like to add a little excitement in my life, and if that means sleeping in the same room where a murder was committed I’m down for that.” Johnathan chuckled.

“You’re gross. They probably didn’t clean the blood stained sheets either.” Ren unlocked the front door and opened it quietly.

“Gives you more of an experience in the raw.” Johnathan snorted, “Maybe I can take the sheets as a souvenir. Hang it on my wall on silver hooks and all that horror-esque crap.”  

“What you’re spewing from your mouth is crap and disgusting.” Ren put the house key into his pocket.

Johnathan rolled his eyes knowing fully well how much of a hypocrite Ren is, but decides to shrug it off letting Ren have the victory for tonight. He watched Ren step inside of the house. Ren turned to look at Johnathan with tired but genuinely calm eyes.

“Well, today was an … experience. I’ll see you tomorrow, right?” Ren asked, leaning against the door way.

“Yeap! Do you want to meet up somewhere in the afternoon? I mean, I’ll probably go on sight seeing a bit, but we can meet for lunch over at the deli that’s by the hotel that usually serves really good subs.” Johnathan’s mouth watered just remembering how much he missed the food in town.

“Uhh, sure! Since it’s a Saturday tomorrow and I’m off, so that works! Say about three-thirty?” Ren offered.

Johnathan nodded with an approved smile. He looked to his left and right before stepping up closer to Ren.

“I’ll see you then.” Johnathan planted his lips onto Ren’s forehead before taking off, leaving Ren completely flabbergasted.

Ren just watched Johnathan jogging to where he needs to be with his face turning red.

“The fuck …?” Ren blinked, getting inside the house and closing the door before locking it.

He sighed heavily and noticed that inside of his home was completely dark and quiet. There was a faint scent of cooked food. It smelled rather good and caused Ren’s stomach to growl. Stimpy must’ve made dinner. Ren carefully walked his way to the dimly lighted kitchen to where he was introduced to a sleeping large man laying his arms and head on the dining table. It was Stimpy. The dining table had nothing on it but just Stimpy and what seems to be a piece of paper underneath his arms. Ren approached him and cocked his head to try to read on what Stimpy had written on the paper. He could only make out a few words considering that majority of it was blocked from Stimpy’s arms. Ren groaned and very carefully slide the paper away from Stimpy without waking him up. Using the only source of light from the kitchen which was illuminated from the overhead oven light.

_Renny,_

_It seems that you were coming home late, so I put away dinner into some containers and into the refrigerator. You’ll probably need to heat them up, but it should be still delicious. Every piece from the chicken leg to the peas were all cooked with love~_

_Much love, Stimpson_

Ren couldn’t help himself but roll his eyes reading the letter in Stimpy’s voice. All lovey-dovey just as usual. Al though he couldn’t help but feel bad that an entire dinner was wasted because he wanted to spend some more time with Johnathan. It made him feel guilty that he didn’t call Stimpy to let him know that he was coming home later than usual. How worried was Stimpy, Ren asked himself. Possibly a lot. Especially how the morning started to sour between the two of them. This is not good.

He lost his appetite.

“Mmmm …” Stimpy mumbled in his sleep.

Ren walked up to him quietly and ran his fingers through his ruby red hair. It was soft with no signs of dryness whatsoever. His fingers trailed to Stimpy’s cheeks which felt damp. He had been crying which must’ve sent him to sleep.

_Shit_

If there was anything that Ren hated in the entire world was Stimpy crying. Even if he’s crying in front of him or had been crying, just seeing or imagining how pitiful he looked would always make him feel as if a bullet was shot through his heart. The pure genuine hurt that Stimpy would display was just too much. Right now, images of how hard Stimpy must’ve cried earlier today were now being played over and over again in Ren’s head. He needed to get away. He needed something else to distract him or at least help him melt away the guilt. The guilt that came along with the strong stench of alcohol and sweat. It came clear that a shower was what he needed and to get his clothes cleaned up right away. Ren tip-toed to the bathroom where he stripped of his dirty pungent smelling clothes and threw them on the floor to be taken care of later. He looked himself in the mirror for a bit to see the dark circles under his eyes and blood-shot red eyes. His physique was still the same. Fairly thin with some dry patches here and there on his skin. All he knew was that he’ll feel much better after being succumbed to the warm embrace of clean water.

“Hmm.” Ren hummed, turning on the water that was at the right temperature.

He stepped into the shower while closing the curtains behind him. As he thought, the water was heavenly with the white noise of the water bringing calmness in his mind. It didn’t take long for his entire body to be soaking wet. His blonde hair drooping over his shoulders and the stench from the club slowly disappearing. Ren looked over to see a bar of soap on the shower caddy that seemed to be new. Stimpy was probably cleaning around and saw that there needed to be new one. Ren smiled a bit and grabbed it gently so it wouldn’t slip. It was one of those dove soaps with the tiny blue beads insides. Whatever gets the smell out, he thought.

As he was lathering his body, he couldn’t shake off the kiss that Johnathan gave him earlier in his mind. His lips felt so soft and warm against his skin. In a strange way, he longed for more. To have Jonathan gently brush his hands against his red beat cheeks, planting more sweet kisses on his face. Such sweet tenderness. It was making Ren’s heart race and his face all red again.

He wondered. What would Johnathan’s kisses feel on certain parts of his body. His lips. His neck. His chest. His stomach. Everywhere. Ren closed his eyes, using the tip of his right fingers to slowly trail down his chest to his abdomen. Making circular motions with his fingers it caused the hairs to stick up on the back of his neck. He brought back up his fingers to gently pinch and play with his right nipple making it completely erect. Ren let out a soft moan as he felt something pulsing between his legs.

“Aaughhh, shit. What the fuck am I doing?” Ren whispered to himself, coiling his left fingers around his stiffening penis.

Using his thumb to roll around the tip, he imagined it was Johnathan’s pierced warm tongue. How he would tease him by sucking the pre-cum soaked tip into his mouth. His beautiful hazel eyes looking up at him daringly to wonder if he should let him cum or not. With the proper begging and demands, Johnathan then gives in sucking in Ren’s entire cock. Rubbing it against his hallow cheeks right before he shoves it to the very back of his throat. The vibrations of his humming sends shivers down Ren’s spine.

“O—Oh god …” Ren moaned, pumping his red eager cock.

A few more pumps and tugs, Ren’s climax came approaching quickly. His legs tingling and his balls tightening.

“A—Aaghhhh f-fuck!” Ren cried out, his seed spilling on his hand including the tile on the wall.

He slowly opened his eyes, catching his breathe. After his climax faded, Ren let go of his limp penis and resumed to clean himself up. He wasn’t really sure what just happened, but it drained the last bit of energy he had left in him. It was just a quickie. That’s all. It doesn’t mean anything.

Ren turned off the water when he was done washing his body and hair, grabbing his towel the hanging rack outside of the curtains.

“What the fuck is wrong with me?” Ren shook his head, too tired to get into this shit again.

As soon as his body was dry, leaving his hair slightly wet, he turned off the lights In the bathroom and headed towards the bedroom to finally get some sleep.


	7. Chapter 6.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please know that I do not own Ren and Stimpy for they belong to Nickelodeon while Johnathan is my character. I also do not own any music lyrics that will/are mentioned in some chapters. I do this for purely entertainment, no fund gains whatsoever~ This is a slash fanfiction of Ren and Stimpy and does have my R/S OC Johnathan on which will be more fleshed out than he was in my old fanfiction. This will have OCxCanon Character moments but I reassure you that this is an Ren/Stimpy fanfic. Also please be warned that this fanfiction does contain material that might make some readers uncomfortable as it discusses violence, sex, abuse, and drugs and alcohol so viewer discretion is advised.

Ren had slept on the couch for the entire night. Just to get a few hours of complete solitude to try to get his thoughts together. Hair still wet from the shower before turning in. Stimpy was fast asleep and still is considering that it was only five-thirty in the morning. It was rather hard to sleep knowing that he has treated Stimpy like shit in the last twenty-four hours ever since Jonathan arrived. Trying to convince himself that it wasn’t his fault or how he wished that things would’ve ended up different. Ren was now … confused and rather irritated to the point where started to develop a migraine. Pain pulsing behind his eyes. A new day and everything had already started to go downhill. It was at that moment that he remembered that he was going to meet up Jonathan around the afternoon to go get lunch, but to be honest, food had only made him feel nauseous. Figuring that he needed to text Johnathan before the early afternoon could come. Getting out his phone as he had to let his eyes adjust to the intense light. 

_Hey,_

_Listen, I’m not feeling all that good today as my head really fuckin’ hurts. I don’t know if it’s from the alcohol or what, but I feel like shit. I hope we can reschedule lunch another time._

It was only half of the truth of when he said that he felt ill due to the alcohol. It was also the intense stress of his head trying to correlate of all these thoughts of relationships and just feelings in general that he doesn’t understand. Ren honestly didn’t feel like writing everything in details. Just leave of what the text says at that and sleep for the entire day. Maybe talk to Stimpy depending on how he feels later. If …. he’ll talk to him … 

*~*~*~*

A few hours have passed later and Ren had woken to the sound of his cellphone going off from receiving a message. Ren groaned into his pillow and stretched. After a nice crack from his back, he stretched over to grab his phone and opened up the message. 

_Hey Renny,_

_Don’t worry about it as I was about to text you that I won’t be able to go to lunch today as I have some issues to attend to. I won’t go into details, but it turns out that I need to stay here for a few more days. We can reschedule another time. Just shoot me a text whenever you want._

Ren sighed in relief. He was very happy at least that Johnathan understood, but a bit curious as to what type of issues he was dealing with. He didn’t know if Johnathan’s visit was just a visit after reading this. Frankly, Ren didn’t care anymore. It wasn’t any of his business anyways. 

To break the conflict in his head, he heard shuffling in the kitchen. Was Stimpy up? Was he angry with him? Did he just now figure out that he moved to the couch last night? It scared him. Making his heart skip beats, he laid still on the couch. His body sinking into the cushions as he huddled into the blanket. The smell of coffee was hitting his nose. It was his favorite. Dark roast with just the right amount of coffee grounds. No cream and sugar, just black. 

“Ren?” Stimpy called out from the kitchen, making Ren flinch. “Are you up?” 

He didn’t sound like he was mad, but just tired with his voice hoarse. Probably from the crying last night when he got home. He didn’t want to say anything. To just let Stimpy still think he’s sleeping is what he wanted. Lay perfectly still, he thought. Be patient. 

….

…

…

“Renny?” Stimpy whispered in his ear. 

With a harsh gasp, Ren jumped almost having him fall off the couch. How in the hell did he not hear him walk on over to him? If anything, Stimpy was not a quiet guy in the slightest, but this came as a big surprise for Ren. 

“The fuck, man?! You scared the shit out of me. Don’t fuckin’ do that …” Ren clutches his shirt. “I was tryin’ to sleep …” 

Stimpy frowned as he twiddled his fingers. 

“I’m sorry, Ren, but it just seemed out of character of you to be sleeping at this hour, even on a weekend. Are you alright?” He looked at the ground, still wearing his pajamas. 

_No._

“Yeah, I just ….. I didn’t sleep well at all last night.” Ren ran his fingers through his blonde hair, sitting up on the couch. 

“Did …. anything happen when you were gone with Johnathan?” Stimpy felt ballsy for asking, but he felt it was important. 

_Just the act that he practically told me how he felt and now I’m a conflicted mess._

“Mmm, no. Just had a few drinks, talked, and went for a little walk.” Ren shrugged. “I guess the alcohol didn’t settle too well, or the bar wasn’t really clean.” 

 _Also he kissed me._  

“Nothing out of the ordinary.” 

Stimpy hummed for a bit, his soft little smile appearing on his face but it seemed worried. 

“Well, … alright.” 

Poor naive fool. He can’t even tell when he’s being lied to in front of his face. So trusting, so foolish, so stupid. Ren usually wouldn’t give a care in the world if he lied to Stimpy. Hell, he does it on a daily basis, but right now it all just felt … wrong. Lies piling up ever since Johnathan’s visit. It made him feel guilty. Making his stomach hurt. 

“I wanna rest for today, okay? I really do feel like shit.” Ren laid down, placing his arm over his eyes. 

“Do you want some water? Maybe some antacid? It will help your tummy ..” Stimpy offers, sitting on the ground close to the couch to where Ren and him meet eye to eye. 

Even when sitting down, Stimpy still seemed rather tall. Ren can feel him looking down at him making him feel even smaller than he really is. In a way, he had a small desire to be held by someone that was bigger. To get attention from a gentle figure, is what he needs right now. 

“Do you want me to rub your belly?” Stimpy tilted his head, his voice sweet and soft. 

Ren peeked over at Stimpy with those tired eyes for a minute or two, before giving in. It was that voice. Always that sweet, stupid tone. Oh how much he would love to punch Stimpy square in the face for using that against him, but he digresses. Just this once. 

“Go for it ….” Ren grumbled. 

With a sigh of relief, Stimpy gently placed his hand on Ren’s stomach and began to move his hand in a circular motion. The tip of his fingers even touched the edge’s of Ren’s ribs to the happy trail that was leading down from his navel. Ren had often forgotten how big Stimpy’s hand was. How it could easily break his bones if needed. But of course the dim-witted gentle soul would never do such a thing. Not even to those who have hurt him so. 

“Mmmm, shit …” Ren exhaled slowly, feeling the pain fade away as he closes his eyes. “That …. feels so good.” 

“I’m so happy. Are you feeling a bit better ….?” Stimpy smiles once more, placing a kiss on Ren’s forehead. 

It did make Ren happy that Stimpy wasn’t angry at him. Even if he was pretending, he was thankful that he was here with him. Ren doesn’t deserve him. Not at all. Re-thinking of how he yelled at him, ignored him, and told him little white lies …. it was too much. 

Feeling the guilt swelling in his chest, his lower lip started to tremble. Turning his head towards Stimpy, the tears came rolling down. Whimpers and sobs along with sniffling, he felt pathetic. 

“Ca-can you … hold me …?” 

Ren didn’t need to ask twice to get of what he wanted. Stimpy was more than willing to embrace his crying friend. Cooing in his ear and rubbing his back. Feeling the tears dropping on his shoulder. It was very hard for him not to burst into tears himself. To hear his very best friend in this state, broke his heart. 

“Oh, Ren, shhhh ….” Stimpy kissed Ren’s shoulder, holding him so close. “It’s okay, Renny, I’m here …” 

Digging his nails into Stimpy’s shirt, he tried to calm himself down. Hearing Stimpy’s reassuring words just made him sob even harder. The huge urge to just spill about the lies was practically about to come out like word vomit. Unfortunately, he was held back due to the fact that he didn’t want to make Stimpy angry with him. It was typical of Ren to repress it all and try to forget it. For now, he would just need to do that, no matter how much the guilt is eating him alive. 

*~*~*~* 

“How could you let this happen …?” 

Two men alone in the hotel room, feet apart from each other as the silence felt like an eternity. An older male shook his head as he sat on the bed. Hair almost completely grey, dark circles under his eyes, and a thin structure. The man didn’t know of what to say. Just sitting on the bed as he cupped his pale sweat ridden face. 

“The sooner that you paid off your debt, you fall into another hole ….” The younger male turns himself away towards the door. “How are we going to fix this? How the fuck could you get yourself involved ….?” 

“I ….. wasn’t ….” The old man coiled his hands into fists, “I didn’t mean for this to happen. I–I’m … I’m so sorry …” 

“Sorry? You’re … sorry? How the fuck is sorry going to fix this?!?” The distressed young adult grits his teeth, tempted to punch the wall. “Dad, ….. what the fuck are we going to do?” 

“I don’t know, Johanthan ….. I don’t know.” 


	8. Chapter 7.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please know that I do not own Ren and Stimpy for they belong to Nickelodeon while Johnathan is my character. I also do not own any music lyrics that will/are mentioned in some chapters. I do this for purely entertainment, no fund gains whatsoever~ This is a slash fanfiction of Ren and Stimpy and does have my R/S OC Johnathan on which will be more fleshed out than he was in my old fanfiction. This will have OCxCanon Character moments but I reassure you that this is an Ren/Stimpy fanfic. Also please be warned that this fanfiction does contain material that might make some readers uncomfortable as it discusses violence, sex, abuse, and drugs and alcohol so viewer discretion is advised.

Red rings around his eyes and practically trembling from being so famished. It had felt like forever since Ren had cried so hard in his life, frankly, he needed it despite feeling vulnerable. Stimpy would never mind it. He had witnessed Ren crying from time to time, and would often encourage him to do so. It’s never healthy to repress such negative feelings, Stimpy would say. If only it was that easy. To confess of the little white lies that he not only told Stimpy, but to Johnathan as well. Why should he care though? Ren is notorious for lying. Why would he regret it now, of all times? Perhaps with so much going on in a short amount of time, it was stressing him out more than usual.

Stimpy suggested that they would take a bath together. Have him scrub away all of the worries away. Ren didn’t have the mental energy to object, only to roll his tired eyes and give a slight reluctant nod. With excitement, Stimpy was the first to go inside of the bathroom to start drawing up the bath. To be fair, a nice warm bath did sound good. Though he showered last night to wash away the mere stench of the strip club, it would help feel that cleansing sensation take heed of his body and mind. As long as the windows were closed, locked, and covered, he was more than fine with taking a little bath. He learned that to take habit of it after the embarrassing incident years ago when he was tremendously sick.

Mind feeling like static only making him look like a complete fool of himself almost tripping over a couple of times trying to take off his pants. Of course all of the living room and kitchen curtains were covering the windows so no one could see him even if they squinted hard enough. Cursing under his breath, he makes his way towards the bathroom. The sound of water hitting the ceramic tub, Ren could also hear water swishing around as if someone was settling themselves in.

“Hey, …. is it ready yet, moron?” Ren called from behind the door, voice raspy and tired. 

“Come on in!” Stimpy called to him sweetly. 

_Aw god._

With a sigh, he enters in the bathroom, only to have his face flushed of what he’s currently witnessing. Stimpy sitting in the bathtub, completely nude with a few light bubbles surrounding his chest, and a fresh new sponge in his left hand. Ren didn’t know why, but he covered his eyes. It made Stimpy giggle.

“Oh come now, why are you so embarrassed? We used to do this all the time when we were in the college.” Stimpy crossed his arms, a cheeky smile appearing on his face. 

“Well, yeah, because we only had tight schedules and sharing a bath or a shower was much more easier than to wait, stupid.” Ren removed his hand covering his eyes, but still looking the other way. 

“Now, Ren, are ya gonna keep standing there or are ya gonna let the water get cold?” Stimpy said, wagging his finger. 

“Okay, alright, I’m comin’ in. Christ, ….” Ren groaned, walking forward as he finally gets into the tub. 

Stimpy being at the far end in the tub, Ren had sat down between his legs to where Stimpy could only see his back and hair. How pale he looked and thin his hair was. It made the large man sad, but needed to be strong for Ren’s sake. Soaking the sea sponge in the water, he gently placed it on Ren’s back and began to scrub in a circular motion. Scrubbing underneath his shoulder blades and down his spine, Stimpy became mesmerized on just how detailed Ren’s back was. How fragile it looked. The tiny little bumps that were visible down his spine. How tempting it was to just …. kiss each and every little bump. To hear sweet little moans coming from Ren. Inching downward where his hands would cup Ren’s thighs and message deeply to soothe the tense muscles. How soft his skin feels. Kissing every inch of it, … how badly Stimpy wanted his lips to press against it.

_Oh, Renny …._

“You, uh, … okay back there?” Ren said, his eyes closed with his body leaning forward. “You’re kinda quiet.” 

“I– … I’m sorry, Ren. I just …. can’t stop admiring the view …” Stimpy chuckled, though it was quiet. 

Ren rose an eyebrow.

“Eh? What are ya on about?” 

Once Ren said that, Stimpy’s heart started to accelerate. How was he supposed to explain himself better when he’s so honest with everything? Stimpy had always been the one to pour his heart out on something. Figured he should do it now. Ren is too exhausted to do anything physically anyway.

“W-well, …I …… I’ve …. always admired your physique. How … from the back I can almost see the little spine bumps going down along with how much your shoulder blades stick out …” Stimpy traced the tip of his finger all over Ren’s back, causing Ren to shiver and let out a tiny whimper. 

It tickled, but it strangely felt good. Ren didn’t care much for physical touching, but when it calls for getting personal attention, he didn’t want it to stop.

“How soft your skin is ….” Stimpy whispers, placing both of his hands on Ren’s shoulder and begins to rub his thumbs just above his scapula’s. 

God, Ren didn’t know how Stimpy could be so good at soothing away the painful tension in his back. Letting out a satisfied purr, he felt like he was going to fall asleep.

At this point, he felt something hot blow on the nape of his neck. Startled Ren a bit, but ….

“I just love everything about you …” Stimpy continued, instinctively giving Ren a little kiss on the shoulder.

Ren’s heart beat pounding hard in his ears after feeling those velvety soft lips against his wet skin. It made him thought of how different it felt from how Johnathan kissed him. There was a certain firmness to it but it was confident as it showed just how Johnathan wanted the other to know of how much of a good kisser he was. However, Stimpy’s was more shy …. but very tender. Ones that makes your heart flutter. Maybe not the assertiveness that Ren would often crave for, but it was something. Right now, he didn’t know what to do. He was just so exhausted and sick of fighting with his conscious that whatever will happen … will happen. He didn’t want Stimpy to stop giving him the loving attention.To continuously whisper sweet praises into his ear. To hold his small body against his.

“S-stimpy …” Ren whined, trying to keep his composure. 

Trailing his kisses around Ren’s shoulder to the back of his neck, Stimpy slides his hands underneath Ren’s chest. Thumbs messaging the skin as they softly grazed against his nipples. An audible moan coming from the smaller one’s mouth, it was quickly covered.

Cheeks flushing, something clicked in Stimpy’s head to keep going. Just from Ren’s body language he was very much enjoying this.

“Tell me what you wish for me to do, Ren. Please, …..” Stimpy exhaled softly, nuzzling against Ren’s shoulder. “I want to help you ease your mind …” 

Fuck it.

Carefully turning himself around, Ren placed both hands on the rim of the tub as he slid himself towards Stimpy more. Having his legs be on the outside of Stimpy’s practically straddling him. Ren still couldn’t believe on how large Stimpy was. It was like being on top of a love sack. Awkward, but comfortable. Crawling ontop of Stimpy till they met eye to eye.

“R-ren? …. W–what …… A-are you okay?” Stimpy gulped, placing his hands on Ren’s hips. 

“Stimpy, shut up …” 

Not giving him a chance to reply, Ren places his lips against Stimpy’s. The other squeaked in surprise, it didn’t take very long for the kiss to turn into a heated make out session. Catching their breathes a couple of times before proceeding.

“M–Mmm, … Oh, Renny ….” Stimpy moaned, now kissing and licking Ren’s adam apple to his jawline. 

Biting his lower lip hard, Ren felt a pulsating sensation in his cock as it was rubbing against Stimpy’s stomach. He could’ve sworn he felt Stimpy’s own erection rubbing against him. In Ren’s mind, he wanted to take Stimpy’s cock and insert it inside. However, without the assistance of lubricants, it would be very painful. Even with water, it’s not sufficient enough.

Taking one of Stimpy’s hands, he leads it downward pass his abdomen. Panting and eager to have Stimpy’s fingers wrapped around his cock, he balances himself with his free hand on the edge of the tub.

“I n-need you to touch me ….” 

At first Stimpy didn’t really understand of what he meant, but with Ren’s erection touching his fingers to the palm of his hand, he got the idea.

“A-are you sure? Is …. is it really okay?” 

“Yes, yes, yes, just …. m-make a god damn move, Stimps …” Ren grits his teeth, moving his hips to grind on Stimpy’s hand. 

Not going to ask twice, Stimpy finally grabs Ren’s erection into his hand and starts to slowly make a pumping motion. Having his thumb to diligently rub the very tip, Stimpy watches Ren’s reactions carefully.

As expected, Ren’s whole demeanor starts to change into a submissive display. The sensation of Stimpy’s hand along with the warm bath water surrounding the hardened penis was driving Ren mad in a lustful bliss. Delightfully moaning and panting, Stimpy was taking in of what he was seeing right in front of him.

“O–Oh f-fuck, …… f-faster ….. p-please ….” Ren closes his eyes tightly. 

“R-renny, …” 

Doing of what he was told, the pace of his hand increased. With Stimpy’s own penis becoming erect due to the fact that he was pleasing the man that he had loved for a number of years. Gripping harder and moving his hand faster, Ren got louder as his head was in the clouds. Body trembling and goosebumps forming on his arms, euphoria coursing towards his stomach and thighs. Ren was close. No more worries. No stress. Nothing.

“S–stimpy! I– …. c–c ……….” Ren gasped, hips twitching. 

With the last few thrusts that Ren had to give, he came. From there on out, Ren slowly lowered himself to where his head was underneath Stimpy’s chin. Shivering from the fading heat as the water was no longer warm, but an uncomfortable room temperature. Washing the cum off of his hand with the water, he placed a hand on top of Ren’s head caressing it softly.

“Should probably take a hot shower before you can get some more rest. How about it, Renny?” 

“Mmm ….” 

*~*~*~*

At a local bar, there was Johnathan, drinking away shot by shot just to at least calm his nerves after finding out of what happened. This sadly wasn’t the first that of his father getting himself into a financial rut, but this …. this was huge. He might not be able to save his father on this one. All of his life how he had to work to help his father pay back loan sharks. His entire life practically dedicated to save his father’s neck. One hole into another, … he finds his own flesh and blood to be in a much bigger hole. Gambling away dangerously with a leader of a gang that was notorious for picking up potential prey to suck away their money and possibly their lives. It made Johnathan angry. His father knew better.  After time again and again, Johnathan might just well throw in the towel and let his father drown.

But he couldn’t. How could he? To his own father.

If only his mother was still around.

“One shot of Grey Goose, please …” 

The voice of another man came in to the bar as he settles his work case on the side of the chair before settling himself on it. Johnathan took a side glance towards the gentlemen. A dapper fellow he is. Seems to be close to his mid thirties, long black hair, and a tall figure. Seems that he was here to have a drink or two before going home. Johnathan could also see that he seemed to have a long day and was tired …. perhaps …. needed some company.

Chugging the remains of his shot glass, he scoots himself carefully and slowly closer to him. The man didn’t really seem to mind all that much. Seems that he was scrutinized on his drink to really notice Johnathan. Time to make a move.

“Long day at work?” Johnathan spoke, voice slightly slurred from his previous drinks. 

The man turned his head towards him, giving Johnathan a stern look but nodded none the less. Johnathan saw the other’s eyes and saw how perfectly green they were. Shining ever so softly from the dim lights of the bar.

“Indeed.” He said, took a clean swig of his drink. “When you work as a therapist, most days are very tiring.” 

A therapist, huh? He seems to be the type. That face says it all, at least to Johanthan. A man that has heard a lot of things from his clients that no other human being might have known about. It is his job after all, but it takes a understanding mind as well as great training to do what he has to do.

“Hmm, judging on that exhausted look on your face I can understand why. Not that I’m makin’ fun of you or anything, but you look like you could use someone to talk to yourself.” Johnathan nodded. 

“Hm, don’t we all. I can understand of your sudden concern, sir, but I can reassure you that’s not necessary. Even if I get tired by the end of the day, I can walk home happy knowing that I have made my client’s day a bit better.” The man shrugged his shoulders before exposing a polite smile towards Johnathan. “What about you?” 

“Me?” 

“Yes. I mean, it is none of my business, as you can be here just to enjoy a few drinks. Or just to ease your mind? I am not sure.” The stranger twirled the tip of his finger on the rim of the shot glass. 

Johnathan’s smile had turned into something that was uncertain. Of course he has so much to say. He was right to say that it was none of his business, but it would be up to Johnathan to say. He senses that this guy has no ill-intentions whatsoever, and if he was willing to lend to ear to him, Johnathan wouldn’t mind sharing his woes.

“Well, let’s just say that I’m going through an inconvenience. Al though, more of an inconvenience. More like I feel like I’m gonna lose my fuckin’ mind because of the life threatening choices my ol’ man makes. I’m …. so tired of it.” Johnathan sighs harshly, rubbing his eyes. 

Seeing Johnathan getting upset so quickly, the man frowns sympathetically.

“Do you wish to talk about it? Al though I am relieved of my work, I can try to give you advice as a person.” 

Johnathan let out a tired chuckle as he smiled. This guy really is a blessing a disguise. He let out a hand for the stranger for him to shake.

“As long as you don’t fall asleep on me, I’m good with runnin’ my mouth. My names Johnthan. You are …..?” 

“Horse, Mr. Horse.” 


	9. Chapter 8.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please know that I do not own Ren and Stimpy for they belong to Nickelodeon while Johnathan is my character. I also do not own any music lyrics that will/are mentioned in some chapters. I do this for purely entertainment, no fund gains whatsoever~ This is a slash fanfiction of Ren and Stimpy and does have my R/S OC Johnathan on which will be more fleshed out than he was in my old fanfiction. This will have OCxCanon Character moments but I reassure you that this is an Ren/Stimpy fanfic. Also please be warned that this fanfiction does contain material that might make some readers uncomfortable as it discusses violence, sex, abuse, and drugs and alcohol so viewer discretion is advised.

For what seems like hours have passed with the two talking men, it was time to leave. Johnathan had shared of what he felt what needed to be shared. Not really giving full details just to play it safe, however, Mr. Horse seems to have a pretty good picture of what’s going on. Though respecting Johnathan’s boundaries, he feels the need to help him whatever he can do. For now, it would be best for Johnathan to get some rest.

“Fuck, man, didn’t mean to jabber yer ears off, but it felt good to talk to someone. Even if it is towards a complete stranger, …” Johnathan gave a tiny buzzed smile before placing the bills on the bar counter.

“On the contrary, we’re not strangers now as we are introduced. More like acquaintances, but I would like to get to know you a lot better. Here …” Mr. Horse grabbed a business card from his jacket pocket and handed it over to Johnathan. “If you ever need me, my number is on the card.” 

“Gee, thanks man.” Johnathan put the business card in the back pocket of his jeans. “Do ya, …. want me to walk ya home? I mean, I’m in no rush to walk back to the hotel or anything.”

Mr. Horse hummed a bit, scratching the thick hairs on his chin. Didn’t really sound like Johnathan was all that enthusiastic to go back as he probably didn’t want to face his father after the argument that they had. Mr. Horse may not look it, but he was a rather sympathetic sentimental guy it was hard for him not to do something as far as a kind gesture towards another being. Contemplating for a minute, he had a thought.

“How about you stay over at my place for the night? Seems that you and your father need some time to breathe from one another.” Mr. Horse offered. 

“…. Wha?” Johnathan tilted his head a bit, confused. “Really? You’d let a stranger stay at your home? For a therapist, that would seem like the least smartest thing that you would ever suggest to someone.” 

“You may be right, but I know that you hold no ill intentions. I just know that you need some time to clear your mind a bit. If not, I understand.” Mr. Horse softly smiles, placing a hand on Johnathan’s shoulder. “Just know that I’m always around if you need anything.” 

From there, Johnathan’s heart skipped a beat. It felt odd to hear such words from someone like Mr. Horse to say such reassuring words. How serious he was during their talk, but also how attentive he was. It had felt like years since he’s met a kind soul.

“Shit, man. I don’t know what to say, but …. thanks …” Johnathan put his hands in his pockets, awkwardly looking at the ground. 

“No need to thank me.” Mr. Horse smiles, though hard to tell from the darkness outside. 

With the jingle of his car keys, Mr. Horse unlocks his car doors to which he was practically parked close to the bar doors.

“Oh, do you have a car?” He turned towards Johnathan, keys in hand as the dim lights inside of his car slightly illuminated his face.

“N-No, It’s still back at the hotel parking lot. I … didn’t feel like driving after having the argument with my ol’ man. Sure as shit wasn’t going to drive either if I’ve gotten myself absolutely shit faced.” Johnathan explained, feeling rather embarrassed. 

“A good idea, but also a bad one at that. People who try to walk back to their destinations alone drunk is not only stupid, but dangerous. Risking to being kidnapped, killed, or lost. For that I will now allow ..” Mr. Horse went around the other side of his car to open the passenger side awaiting for Jonathan to hop inside.  

“Well, arentcha a gentleman …” Johnathan rolled his eyes and allowed himself inside. “I’m not even that drunk …” 

“Chivalry has nothing to do with it, nor does it matter how intoxicated you are.” Mr. Horse corrected before gently closing the car door.  

Being right on both points, Johnathan crossed his arms in defeat, but didn’t really feel the frustrations in his chest that he would usually feel when someone would be scolding him or constantly nagging at him. Mr. Horse was just telling the truth, and didn’t really remark on his snarky comments. Seems that the therapist has dealt with attitudes like this before several times and would know of how to handle it professionally.

Once Mr. Horse got inside, he put on his seat belt before inserting the key in the ignition.

“Seat belt, please.” 

“O-Oh, right, sorry.” 

“No worries.” 

Once Johnathan was buckled up, Mr. Horse had set his foot on the brakes and put his car into drive. From there on out, it was all smooth driving. How dark everything was besides of what the headlights were showing. It was peaceful to Johnathan. The lingering smell of cheap cigarettes and alcohol didn’t fill his nose as his own car usually would considering that he shares it with his father. The aroma of that new car smell was calming, new, and even strangely comforting.  

“Just out of curiosity, Johnathan, do you have family here?” Mr. Horse asked, his eyes concentrated on the road.

The sudden question had Johnathan raise an eyebrow. Thinking about it, he never really thought about his relatives only because he doesn’t have any or at least know any of them that would want to contact either him or his father. Grandparents from both sides of his passed long before Johnathan was even born, and his uncle from his father’s side had cut off all contact after a nasty theft incident. Understandably so. Johnathan never blamed him.

“Nah, … not really. I do have a good friend here who’ve I’ve known for certain amount of years. Ren Hoek.” Johnathan answered, sinking into his seat.

For a moment, Mr. Horse’s eyes widened though half of the concern was still on the road. That name alone has made him grip the leather wheel rather tightly. Chewing his lower lip and discomfort in his legs, Mr. Horse tried to keep his composure as he didn’t want to make this conversation go silent in a matter of minutes.

“I see.” 

The tone in Mr. Horse’s words sounded …. strained and rather dissapointed.  

“You … know him?” Johnathan asked cautiously. 

Of all the things that Mr. Horse wanted to say, he wanted to say unpleasant things about Ren. Of all the times that he had witness his attitude along with his short-temper was abysmal. He had a session with him. Once. And only once. God, he had never had patient like Ren before and thankfully he had NEVER had one like him ever again. Knowing now that Johnathan knows him, he had to choose his words carefully just so he doesn’t possibly open up a new can of worms. He didn’t know the connections, so he can’t say until Mr. Horse could really share his personal opinions.

“Yes, I do.” Mr. Horse says flatly. “You’ve said you’ve known him for a number of years?” 

“Yeah.” Johnathan nods, his eyes drooping a bit. “Since high school. Maybe even further? I don’t remember, but yeah, we go way back.”

His expression softens, Mr. Horse rubs his eyes as he stops on a red light. It was tempting to just spill everything about his own experiences, but not yet. Not until he knows the relationship between him and Johnathan.  

“But honestly, .. after all these years. He hasn’t really changed. I won’t lie to ya, but …. I kind of expected him to be more than what he was in high school or even college. Not that I’m saying that it’s a bad thing, but seeing myself on how I acted along with him in those days, I laugh. Though for the most part … I feel ashamed.” Johnathan continues, staring blankly at his hands. “How I hurt people that really didn’t deserve it with … god awful pranks that seemed funny, well, at least Ren thought they were funny.” 

Johnathan’s throat ran dry. Alcohol still coursing throughout his body, it was hard to keep his eyes open. Saying words that he worried wouldn’t make sense, but Mr. Horse hadn’t corrected him so far. Johnathan knew that it was one of his habits. Correcting people, but with no intention of making fun of the other.

“But, …. looking back on it, I should’ve listened to that little voice in my chest saying how wrong it all is and that it needed to stop. I just wanted to do everything that Ren wanted to do. Not just because I had this weird infatuation with him, but because Ren can be viciously persuasive.”

Mr. Horse hummed in response. Almost like he knew exactly of what Johnathan was talking about. Viciously persuasive. How two words can mean so much in more ways than one. 

“How angry he gets when I even slightly object to a ‘prank’. That was the first thing I noticed when I went to his house the other day. Just the way he was spitting such angry and hateful words towards other people, including Stimpy.” Johnathan sighed harshly, shaking his head. “How much I was looking forward to seeing a big change. Nothin’ but wishful thinkin’.” 

“That’s a big difference between you and Ren, Johnathan.” Mr. Horse finally spoke, pulling up in his two-car garage. 

“H-huh?” 

“You’ve changed, is what I meant. I do not know you as a person in full detail, but I know from the words you have spoken, it seems to me that you were very much peer pressured by Ren. Not to excuse your actions, but I can understand that mentality especially at such a young age. Where you believe the one person in your life who you look up to so much does these awful actions, but you do not think otherwise because of how much you care for them.” Mr. Horse explains as he unbuckles his belt. 

“I wouldn’t say that I’ve changed completely. I still …. have a lot of feelings for Ren, ….” Johnathan closes his eyes, gripping his pants tightly. 

Mr. Horse stopped. His expression changing into something melancholy but tender.

“Do you love him, Johnathan?” 

Feeling his lower lip tremble, he bit it hard with his canines. Opening his glossy eyes as he arched his head as if he was trying to push back tears. His chest rising quicker within each breath.

“Yeah, ….” Johnathan’s voice broke, drooping his head as he looked out the window, feeling ashamed. “Yeah, I do …”


	10. Chapter 9.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please know that I do not own Ren and Stimpy for they belong to Nickelodeon while Johnathan is my character. I also do not own any music lyrics that will/are mentioned in some chapters. I do this for purely entertainment, no fund gains whatsoever~ This is a slash fanfiction of Ren and Stimpy and does have my R/S OC Johnathan on which will be more fleshed out than he was in my old fanfiction. This will have OCxCanon Character moments but I reassure you that this is an Ren/Stimpy fanfic. Also please be warned that this fanfiction does contain material that might make some readers uncomfortable as it discusses violence, sex, abuse, and drugs and alcohol so viewer discretion is advised.

With the witching hour rolling in and Ren being wide awake due to the number of naps that he’s had today, he was playing around on his phone while Stimpy is fast asleep. After their little fun that they’ve had in the bath including having a long make out session in the shower, Ren couldn’t really get Johnathan out of his mind. He hasn’t really texted him ever since this morning and he was starting to worry if he was making Johnathan feel left out. With a sigh, he got out from the bed quietly as he could and went downstairs towards the kitchen. He was debating if he should make some coffee or not. Though he didn’t want to be too wired, he pulls out his messages to see if Johnathan messaged him yet.

Of course, nothing.

Putting his phone down on the kitchen counter, he peeked through the blinds of the window to look to see if there was anything going on. To his surprise, nothing. However, he did notice …. something just across the street. No, it was someone. Someone leaning against their car with what seems to be a cigarette in his hand. Considering that the guy was right under the street light, his hat had completely overshadowed his face. This was creepy beyond Ren’s comfort levels. The fact that this guy was just …. standing there and possibly staring right at him made his skin crawl. The guy probably knew that he was in there. Ren thanked himself that he didn’t turn on the living room lamp on. Though making sure that all windows and doors are locked is a must.

“Creepy fucker.” Ren mumbled to himself as he quickly went to make sure that all doors and windows were absolutely shut and locked. 

God only knows of what this guy wants. Frankly, Ren didn’t WANT to know.

Kitchen, bathroom, living room, guest room, … everything seemed locked and untouched from the first floor. Now, the last room to check was upstairs bedroom and bathroom. Looking up, he suddenly hated on how the stairs looked. Dark and ominous. Letting his imagination get the best of him like a scared child. Thinking such irrational silly things like hands coming out of the walls and underneath the stairs and drag him away.

“ … run up the stairs you fuckin’ pussy …” Ren tells himself, taking a deep breath and closes his eyes tightly. 

Just like that, Ren ran up as quickly as he could, almost tripping a couple of times.

Reaching upstairs, Ren felt the relief overcome him. Knowing that Stimpy was in the bedroom practically snoring made him feel calm for once. Tip-toeing around the remaining rooms, Ren felt something that was rather … off. He really couldn’t put his finger on it, but it felt as if he was being watched. He didn’t dare to think that there were more of them out there. God, he had hoped and prayed that the one by the street light is just the one.

Making sure, and very much sure that he was going to regret it, he goes by the bedroom blinds and goes to check outside carefully. The worst part of it was that it was completely dark. Not even the street lights were bright enough to pierce the darkness of their backyard. In a way, it kind of relieved him. If it was too dark to see outside, it would be too dark for anybody to see anything from the inside. It was possibly his own paranoia that was making him feel this way. He was contemplating about calling the cops, but the guy would’ve been far from gone by the time they get here. What would he tell them? That some creepy fuck was outside his house and he had no idea of what he looked like? Yeah. Sure.

With an exhausted sigh, he got into bed slowly and crawled inside the covers. It was hard to believe, but Ren was scared. Very scared to the point where he began to shiver.

Feeling Stimpy’s warmth radiating from him, Ren scooted himself closer to him. Even tightly wrapping both of his arms around Stimpy’s. Closing his eyes tightly. Ears picking up the clanks and creaks of the house resting making him think it was someone lurking around.

“S-stimpy …?” Ren whimpered, “S …… stimpy?” 

With a few shakes and even a good harsh nudges with his knees, he finally got him to wake up and to cease his obnoxious snoring.

“Mmmmm, hmmm?” Stimpy groaned, one eye peeking at Ren. 

“I … I can’t sleep …….” Ren whispered. 

“Oh? …..” Stimpy rubs his eyes, almost on the verge of falling asleep again. “How come?” 

Ren wanted to tell Stimpy about the man he had seen. However, it would probably turn out to be one of those cliche scenes where he would say something and then the man would be long gone by now. Ren didn’t really know of what to say. He was conflicted if he should tell another lie or tell Stimpy of what’s really going on for a change. Did he really need to worry about it? Would he really understand? Probably not.

“N-Nevermind, … I’ll tell ya in the mornin’.” Ren mumbled, pulling the covers over him. 

“Mmmm, …. okaaayyy …” Stimpy yawns as he wraps an arm around him. 

From there, Ren felt an immediate sense of security. Stimpy pulling him into a sleepy embrace made him feel so stupidly warm and fluttery inside. Letting Stimpy do whatever he wants, he closes his eyes to drift into a calm sleep.

*~*~*~*~

With the remaining hours left before sunrise, Johnathan remained awake in the home of Mr. Horse. The environment around him was … overwhelming. He wasn’t used to being in homes that were filled with expensive furniture, antiques, and bookcases larger than himself. All he’s ever known was cheap hotels, trailer parks, and beat down apartments. Everything was a struggle. To do what he had to do to keep a roof over himself along with his father, it didn’t matter how filth-ridden the place was, it was home.

He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t envious. To be in a high-class house like this, it was like a dream. A dream that was his a long time ago back in college. How all of his hard work studying and working long-shifts would pay off. How life would owe him in the end.

But life has it’s own set of rules. How cruel and unfair it can be. Johnathan understood that reality. If only his father would. If he knew then of what he knows now, none of this would’ve happened.

However, …. there’s no point dwelling on it now. Johnathan was far too tired to really cause his body anymore stress. He didn’t want to bother to look at his phone either.

Maybe a book would help. It’s been a while since he’s really picked up a book. Not that he wanted to. Just never found the time.

Getting up from his bed in the guest room, he makes his way towards the living room as he turns a lamp on. The hardwood floor cold beneath his feet, it was oddly comforting. The room itself had a cozy atmosphere. An unlit fireplace with a widescreen t.v above it, two leather reading chairs, a couch that looks to be soft to the touch, a mahogany book case that was filled with a variety of books it seems, and finally … a simple rug in the middle of the room. Letting out a content sigh, Johnathan begins to scan through the book case with the tip of his index finger. Psychology, sociology, psychopathology, neuropsychology, philosophy, some written by independent authors about their experiences as therapists, and … even some poetry. H.P Lovecraft, Tennessee Williams, Sylvia Plath, and even Edgar Allan Poe. Haven’t heard that name since high school, he thought. Feeling nostalgic, he pulled out the book of which contained all of Poe’s notorious writings and poems.  

Johnathan remembered how he had to do a report about Poe and what writing of his influenced him the most while Ren had Emily Dickinson. The echoing voice of Ren’s complaining ringed in his ears.

_“Seriously, how am I supposed to understand this poetic shit? If I really wanted to be THIS depressed I would’ve gone through my ol’ man’s ‘secret’ stash.”_

_“The whole point of understanding these poets, Ren, is that they’ve used this type of writing to expel their anguishes even if may seem out of the norm. Not a lot of people back in those times really understood depression or how to properly deal with it.”  
_

_“Okay there, Mr. Analysis, no need to go all out on me. Ya might choke. Who you workin’ on?”  
_

_“Edgar Allan Poe.”  
_

_“Hmm, never heard of ‘im. Is he just as depressing as dickson or whatever the fuck her name is?”  
_

_“Well, I wouldn’t say that, but he has a unique style of writing. He kind of adds a little bit of horror in his works which gives it an extra edge to it, but I guess if I had to pick any of his works that I can relate to in a sense, is ‘Alone’.”  
_

Alone.

Flipping the pages of the book, Johnathan had found it.

 _From childhood’s hour I have not been_  
As others were–I have not seen  
As others saw–I could not bring  
My passions from a common spring–  
From the same source I have not taken  
My sorrow–I could not awaken  
My heart to joy at the same tone–  
And all I lov’d–I lov’d alone–

“And all I loved … I loved alone …” Johnathan whispered to himself, frowning as he did. 

The nostalgia he felt now were tugged heart strings. Feeling the repressed pain that he had felt all those years were now swarming like a dropped wasps nest. This was not how he wanted to spend the rest of the night. Being all melancholy in a home that wasn’t his.

Deciding to put the book away, he started to look for something less depressing.  

While searching, his ear caught the sound of the floor creaking only to realize that someone was stepping inside of the living room. It startled him as he swiftly turned his head to find Mr. Horse by the entrance way. With his heart racing he stepped back from the bookcase as if to say “I wasn’t touching anything!”. However, seeing a small smile on Mr. Horse’s face made him relax.

“I see that you have taking a liking to my collection here …” He said, his voice hoarse as if he had just woken up. 

“Y-Yeah, … I c-couldn’t really sleep, so I thought that reading would help. I … didn’t wake you up, did I?” Johnathan looked down, rubbing his arm in embarrassment. 

“Of course not. I suppose you can call it an intuition. I always know when one is restless, so my body acts accordingly.” Mr. Horse shakes his had, placing a hand on Johnathan’s shoulder.

Johnathan can’t really have himself to forget on how gentle Mr. Horse with. The way he talks, how soft his touch is, and the welcoming aura around him makes Johnathan wish that he knew more people like him.  

“So, … may I ask of what is troubling you?” Mr. Horse took a seat on the couch, patting the spot right next to him. 

With a deep sigh, Johnathan sat right next to him as he drooped his head. Elbows resting on his thighs with his fingers holding his chin, he wasn’t sure on where to start.

“Just …. everything. Me questioning of my own sanity, my … fucking dad, the thought of the mafia looking to serve my ol’ mans head on a silver platter to the head honcho, and ya know … asking myself of what the fuck I’m doing here.” Johnathan said, “Why ….. did I have to come here ….?” 

Lowering his head even more, Johnathan felt as if he was tearing apart inside. He felt so lost into everything that it was hard to really try to tackle all of these problems at once. Johnathan had always had this sense of pride that he could try to outcome any situation even if it meant life and death. However, one could only handle the same situation multiple times to where they have come to the end of their rope. Johnathan, … was very much at the end of his …

“My dear boy, ….” Mr. Horse starts, “It doesn’t take a therapist to know on how much you’re currently going through. How emotionally and mentally straining everything is on you.” 

Johnathan could only scoff at the obvious, not that Mr. Horse was wrong but just how true his words are.

“If I may be so bold as to give you suggestions to make it easier not only for you, but for your father as well. In return, you have to do something for me.”

“ …. Suggestions?” 

“Yes. Now, listen carefully …”


	11. Chapter 10.

Morning came around much sooner than Ren anticipated. Groaning as the light hit his eyes he placed his arm over them to block it off. It was already Sunday. Ren wasn’t sure if he should be pissed off or relieved as tomorrow morning he’ll have to go back to work, or … will he? He can use his vacation days as he hardly even used them in the first place. Not like Stimpy and him went to many vacations anyways as they were mostly reserved for the weekends. Now that it was established that Johnathan was staying longer, it would be a good chance to catch up more.

Oh, that’s right. Johnathan hasn’t really texted him back.

Maybe something happened? It’s possible as the last text that he sent him stated about having “issues” to deal with. Whatever that means. Ren wouldn’t be the type of guy to really intervene with someone else’s business unless it benefits his sadistic urges, but considering that this is his best friend, maybe there was something that he can do to help. With a tired sigh, he sits himself up and rubs his eyes. Looking at the nightshade on his side of the bed, his phone wasn’t there as he had always would to charge it.

Oh wait, it was downstairs on the kitchen counter. Which reminded him of that creepy guy that was standing by himself underneath the streetlight last night. What that was all about? Ren can only hope that would be the only time that he would see the ominous creep again.

He would have to worry about that later as he needed to retrieve his phone in case he missed some calls or missed a text message from Johnathan.

Before he could slide his legs towards the end of the bed, Ren felt something warm and heavy wrap around his waist. It was Stimpy. Scooting himself closer till his forehead made contact with Ren’s made. His hot breath against Ren’s pale skin made it crawl.

“Mmmm, good morning, Renny.” Stimpy whispered sweetly, planting sweet kisses onto Ren.

“Mornin’, stupid.” Ren insulted, “Do you mind? I need to go downstairs to get my phone.”

Stimpy didn’t respond but to only nuzzle himself against Ren. The five o’ clock shadow tickling Ren’s skin to where he squirms in Stimpy’s arms trying not to laugh.

“Hey! Let go of me you fuckin’ weirdo! The hells wrong with you?” Ren slapped Stimpy’s arm.

“U—Uhm, …. R-ren, … do you …. Promise not to laugh?” Stimpy said, his voice heavy with embarrassment.

“… Laugh? Laugh at what? What the fuck did you do?!” Ren’s anger ascending, “I swear to fuckin’ god if you made an accident I’m gonn—“

“N—No, Ren! Nothing like that! I …. I just ….” Stimpy’s lips trembled, “I-I’m, …… h-hard.”

 

Shifting his eyes left to right rapidly, he picked up on what Stimpy was saying. Morning wood. Ren found this to be odd to him as Stimpy would usually stay quiet about his morning … problems. Especially since during the weekdays, Stimpy would be the first one up. 

“I--I just figured, s-since … what we did last night, ……” Stimpy continued, swallowing the hard thump in his throat. “If ….w-we can do something like that again …?” 

 

The weak frail sound of Stimpy’s voice is what made Ren’s heart skip a beat. The sound of sexual needs enlightened him. How submissive Stimpy can be. Is what feeds his own sexual desires. 

 

But, … Ren shouldn’t. He couldn’t. 

 

What about Johnathan? 

 

_ What about him? _

 

Ren wanted to know Johnathan in ways that he never thought that he would. The kiss that he shared with him on that night in the strip club, made his lips tingle with delight. Not to mention the fact that he practically masturbated to him. It made him curious of what Johnathan was like when no one is around. How he gets off. Does he have sex? If so, how does he do it? Who does he do it with? 

 

Who, … 

 

Kind of makes Ren think if he could be his first, or possible the next. 

 

No, no. He shouldn’t be taking up risks like that. Not after Stimpy and him jerked off with one another last night, or at least mostly himself. It wouldn’t be wise to continuously go into one sex act into the other with two different people. 

 

_ Why not? It’s my life. I can do whatever the fuck I want. Who cares about the consequences for once?   _

 

With all the lies building up and the agitation of all these mixed feelings in his brain, Ren figured it was beyond the point of fessing up and to just let them happen. He didn’t care anymore. Whatever will happen, he can figure it out himself in the end. Ren was a smart guy, right?

 

“Renny?” Stimpy said, prompting himself up to where he was on his knees on the bed. 

 

“S-sorry. Lost train of thought, …” Ren shook his head, feeling Stimpy’s hands on his shoulders. 

 

No matter where or what Stimpy was doing, he had always seemed to better of him when it comes to height. How big his hands were. Astounding. How one hand coils around his hardened cock perfectly, made his entire being shiver. 

 

“Mmm, ….” Stimpy hummed, placing his lips on top of Ren’s head. 

“I-I’m sorry, Renny, I c--can t-take care of this myself if you--” 

 

Letting out a choked gasp, Ren silenced Stimpy with a firm squeeze on his morning wood. Even behind a layer of Stimpy pajamas, Ren can feel the intense heat drifting out. God, he was ready. Resting his chin on Ren’s shoulder, Stimpy moans and gasped in his ear. If he wanted, Ren could make him come right now and here, but what fun would that be? 

 

“Mmm, ya like that don’t ya?” Ren started rubbing as his grip became loose, licking his chapped lips. 

 

“MMmm, P--please ….” Stimpy begs, his hips rocking to be in rhythm with Ren’s hand. “I--I want to, mmmph …” 

 

“What? You want to, what? If you’re not going to tell me I can just stop.” Ren grins cruelly, halting his hand movement. 

 

“Reeeeennnnnn!” Stimpy whined, internally becoming slightly agitated. 

 

The smaller man took so much delight into Stimpy’s whimpering and whining. How much in heat he’s in. Made him think of how far that he could push him until Stimpy’s libido would heighten to the point where he would have to take matter in his own hands. Ren didn’t want to admit it, but to be dominated by provoking the other was one of the few ways to tell them to “fuck me”. As much as Ren was the one to take lead and penetrate the other so deeply, it was refreshing to let the other take reigns and do whatever they please with him. In this moment, it was just that, but giving Stimpy a taste of how dominant he should be. 

 

“C’mon, now. You’re a big boy, Stimpy. Show me what you want to do with me.” 

 

Stimpy’s entire mind was in a frazzled state, he didn’t know what to say. His heart accelerated to a degree that it was almost hard to breathe. He wanted to do so many things with Ren. Going as far as to pierce his leaking cock inside of him, but there was no time. Stimpy didn’t want to leave Ren to fetch some sort of lubrication to make the penetration less painful. Thinking about it, there was a way that could benefit them both. 

 

“H-Here, Renny. Bring yourself up here.” Stimpy said, almost in a demanding tone. 

 

_ Now we’re getting somewhere. _

 

Doing as he was told, Ren climbed on the bed as he awaited for further instructions. His back facing Stimpy whilst on his knees, legs were close together to the point where they met. He wasn’t sure of where Stimpy was going with this, but if he was going to stick his boner inside of him it would be painful. However, Stimpy wouldn’t do it if it meant hurting him. 

 

“O-okay, … a--are you ready?” Stimpy whispered in his ear, his stomach practically making contact with Ren’s back. 

 

Without the support of Stimpy prompting him up, he would’ve easily fallen forward and half of him dangling off the bed. With one hand placed on Ren’s chest and the other taking hold of his cock. 

 

“Y-yeah.” Ren replies, grunting from the large soft hand wrapped around him. 

 

Soon, the smaller man gasped as he felt something hard slide through his thighs. It was hot and slightly wet until Ren realized that It was Stimpy’s erection. Looking down slightly, he can see it with his own resting above it. Ren’s entire face grew red as he still couldn’t believe the size differences between them. It didn’t help that Stimpy was practically panting and moaning in his ear making all of the hairs on his skin stand up. 

 

“Your thighs are so soft, Renny. Like silk, …” Stimpy complimented, moving his erection out before sliding it through again making contact with Ren’s balls. 

 

Ren’s heart skipped a beat of what he was witnessing. The only thing that came out of his mouth were gasps and gritting teeth. The muscles in his thighs trembling as his entire body felt like it was going to melt. How slow and careful Stimpy’s movements were. Only raising his libido to mind clouding levels. His cheeks turning red and sweat dripping down his forehead. He arches his head back to where it settles onto Stimpy’s shoulder. 

 

“O-..... F--fuck, …. Oh my god ….” Ren growls, “S--Stimpy, …” 

 

Leaking rapidly, his erection turns beat red. In time, Stimpy moves his hips rapidly making Ren’s thighs wet with his precum. The two of them sharing sweet moans to each other as they would silent it with their lips. Tongues sliding, the two continued to pleasure each other until their bodies had reached their peaks. 

 

~*~*~*~*~

 

After the shower, Ren ran downstairs to grab his phone to receive a couple of messages. They were from Johnathan. Smiling as his predictions were correct, he unlocked his phone and opened the messages. 

 

_ “Hey, Ren. Sorry if I’m bothering you with all these texts, but it’s kind of important. I mean, not too important to be too concerned about. But you get it. I was wondering if you wanted to meet up somewhere today.”  _

 

_ “Only if you want to. If not don’t worry about it. My stay here may be extended.”  _

 

The last text is what kicked Ren’s mind into high-gear. Why is Johnathan pushing to stay here longer? Not that he minded, but something inside of him told him that there’s so much more than what Johnathan is telling him, and he knows that this is true.Today he wants to know of what is going on, one way or another. 

 

With no second thoughts, Ren begins to reply. 

 

_ “Hey, man, don’t worry about it. How about you and I meet up for lunch around that cafe just around the corner of the place that I work?”  _

 

_ Sent.  _

 

With a sigh, he begins to choose the clothes that he wanted to wear for today. Something comfortable but nothing that says “lazy piece of shit” as much he was tempted to. Slipping into one of his ratty pajama bottoms and the shirt he wore last night felt clinged to his mind. Maybe some other time. 

 

Before he could call out to Stimpy, he heard his phone go off. He honestly didn’t expect a response so fast, but he opened the message regardless. 

 

_ “Sounds good! Wanna meet up there in 20 minutes?” _

 

With a smile, Ren doesn’t waste time to text back. 

 

_ “I’ll be ready by then. I’ll meet ya there.”  _

 

_ Sent.  _

 

Ren didn’t know why, but his heart fluttered with excitement. Like he was going to see Johnathan again for the first time in forever. As silly as that sounds, it feels good. 

 

Putting on his jacket, he puts his phone inside and starts heading towards the door to put his shoes on. Stimpy going down the stairs as he continues to dry his hair from the shower before he could catch Ren putting his hand on the knob. 

 

“Renny? Where are you going?” Stimpy asks, a bit disappointed that he’s leaving.

 

“I’m going out for a while. Not that it’s any of your business.” Ren zipped up his jacket. 

 

From there, Stimpy made a good guess that Ren was going to see Johnathan again. As much as a good-hearted and patience man that Stimpy was, he couldn’t help feeling his heart twinge in … jealousy. It was clear that Stimpy had an incredible dislike for Johnathan, but was it because he was a “bad” influence on Ren? Or was it all just jealousy? To Stimpy, it didn’t matter. 

 

“Y-You’re going t-to see Johnathan again, aren’t you?” Stimpy says, his head lowered. 

 

With the rush of anger flooding to his fists, Ren turns around with his patience running irrationally quick.

 

“Yeah? What’s the fuckin’ problem?”

Stimpy didn’t say anything. Only to have his head low and arms crossed. Expression for what seemed to be irritated. Ren found this to only fuel his anger further. 

 

“You fuckin’ serious?! Stimpy, what the fuck is your problem with Johnny? Like, what, you pissed off at him for somethin’ that he did to you … or? What?” Ren raises his voice as he points at Stimpy, “For fuck’s sake, You haven’t even talked to him!” 

 

“W-what if I don’t want to!!” Stimpy snapped, taking Ren absolutely by surprise. “I--I don’t …..” 

 

“You don’t … what? Fuckin’ speak up, ya stupid sack of shit!” 

 

Taken aback by the hurtful words, Stimpy’s eyes become misty but that sour expression is still present. There were so many words that he wanted to say to Ren. So many spiteful words towards, Johnathan, but the fact is that is now it’s true that Stimpy has never even bothered to speak to him. It BOTHERS him to no end that Ren was right.

 

“A’right, y’know what. Fuck it, I’m not gonna stand here and argue with you if you’re gonna act up like this, …” Ren huffs, wrapping his hand around the doorknob and opening the door. 

 

“R--ren, wait!” Stimpy reaches a hand out, tears going down his face. 

 

“I’ll come home later, …” Ren steps outside and slams the door behind him. 

 

Leaving Stimpy alone, again, the larger man sits down on the couch only to feel the sense of deja vu. When Johnathan came for the first time they had a spat. It happened again only this time it hurts ten times worse when Stimpy feels that they have grown so much closer than they were before. How they have kissed and touched each other. How completely smitten Stimpy has at this point. No words can describe of how much in love he was in Ren. Was it wrong to feel like this? Is it wrong to be jealous? Should he even be jealous?

 

Maybe Ren was right, … maybe he did need to get to know the Johanthan that is now instead of the one that he knew in the past. 

 

Maybe. 

  
  


…

 

…

 

_ Knock _

 

_ Knock _

 


End file.
